parenting

Momfirmations Are Exactly What You Need To Hear At Exactly The Right Time
Parenthood

Momfirmations Are Exactly What You Need To Hear At Exactly The Right Time

by Jill
written by Jill

Motherhood is challenging and I am always so thrilled to see when mothers reach out to help other mothers. The village can be such a wonderful place.

Graeme Seabrook, who you may remember from when we shared The Mom Center, her online support network for mothers, has just released a deck of beautifully illustrated affirmation cards called The Momfirmations.

The cards can be used in a variety of ways to inspire and support mothers.

Cards can be pulled daily as a reminder, you can repeat them to yourself in the mirror, you can place them around your home, or use them as a jumping off point for journalling.

There are 55 cards in this pack– Graeme, who has been sharing her #momfirmations on Instagram as well, describes the cards like “a visit from your very best mom friend”.

It’s all about reminding you that you’re a good mom, even on days when you feel like anything but. 

One of the reviews reads:

As soon as I got them in the mail I couldn’t wait to open them. When I did I was blown away, the artwork and words, are just so beautiful. I felt like I just received a hug in the shape of little cards to use every single day. I struggle with depression and these help me stay grounded and I’m already planning on buying more for clients because I know they’ll love them just as much as I do.

Each card has an affirmation along with a reflection question, fully illustrated on the opposite side.

As soon as the cards launched, Graeme noticed that nearly every order coming through was for more than one set of cards- people are buying them as gifts for friends and family members. They would make such a wonderful keepsake for any mom- think baby showers, Mother’s Day, birthday, and beyond. 

You can order your own deck– and one for a friend!- for only $15 each. Graeme is also offering up three Momfirmation decks to three of our readers.

Momfirmations Giveaway

Enter below for your chance to win!

a Rafflecopter giveaway

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Moms, Your Kids Don’t See Your Failures As Failures (They See Magic)
Parenthood

Moms, Your Kids Don’t See Your Failures As Failures (They See Magic)

by Jill
written by Jill

One Christmas, my parents bought all my toys at yard sales. Maybe they did this other years, too, but I specifically remember my mom telling me about this particular year. One of the gifts was a 70s metal dollhouse was a dream come true.

I posted this story on Instagram, asking you to tell us something that your parents did that they might have felt fell short at the time, but that felt like magic to you as a child.

The stories you told were absolutely heartwarming and I wanted to share them here today.

“When I was a kid, on Sunday nights my mom would make popcorn, M&Ms, apple slices, and root beer floats for dinner. She was in medical school and was exhausted. We watched America’s Funniest Home videos together and I thought it was the most magical night. Now as a momma myself, I realize that she was too tired to cook and needed a break.”

“After my parents got divorced, my mom lived in a small, one bedroom apartment. She, my sister, and I all slept in one room- my sister and I alternated between sleeping in bed with my mom and sleeping on a body pillow on the floor. It felt like an adventure and the best sleepover ever! Getting to sleep on the floor on a body pillow was the prime spot. Always felt magical!”

“Our parents took us to Toys R Us on Christmas Eve and let us pick one gift. Later I learned that this was because they had no money before then.”

“My parents couldn’t afford a Cabbage Patch Kids doll, so my mom made me one. I had no idea, until high school, that they weren’t genuine.”

“For several years, I remember my mom driving us to the country roads, taking a machete to cut down a small Charlie Brown-esque tree to spray paint white so we could decorate it for Christmas. I don’t actually remember if there were actually any gifts under the tree, but I remember those trees.”

Related: If You’re Pregnant During The Holidays, This Is For You

“When I was 10, my mother spent months hand sewing Barbie and doll clothes for a Christmas. We lived in Germany and finding doll clothes was next to impossible. She apologized as I opened it because they weren’t ‘real’ but there were hundreds of unique outfits that I fell in love with. As an adult, now I know how much she put into it and it will always remain one of the best present she ever gave me. I kept and passed them on to my own daughter.”

“We had literally no money. Dinner was my parents sitting at the dinner table with us and saying they weren’t hungry, so my brother and I could eat. So, one year we were five and six my mom went to the dollar store and got a few coloring books, a couple boxes of crayons, a few packs of socks, a couple candy bars- stuff like that. We thought it was so awesome that we didn’t get clothes that year and were SO happy. When I was a new mom, with Christmas on its way, my mom told me she cried that year because Christmas couldn’t be more for us. I told her that was one of our favorite Christmases because it was so different than all the others, and we hated getting clothes!”

“Our lights got shut off more than a few times growing up. My mom said it made her cry at night and feel genuinely awful, but we thought candlelit pizza picnics inside were literally magic.”

“My mom was a young, divorced single mom until I was almost 5. It was nearly impossible to make ends meet. She used to let me build cities in the kitchen for my dinky cars with pots and pans, and cookie sheets as ramps. She’d let me dress up in her clothes and we’d have a dance party. We got everywhere on her bike with a kids seat on the back, or by bus. All magical.”

Related: 31 Childhood Books We Couldn’t Wait To Read To Our Kids

Share these stories with someone who could use reassuring that a magical childhood doesn’t come from parental perfection or and endless budget.

Your kids will remember the time you spend with them and the feelings they had. They don’t have the frame of reference or the experience to know when something isn’t going to plan or isn’t the way you remember it being when you were a child.

The tiniest moments will feel like magic to your kids. Remember this the next time you feel like you’re failing or even flailing. If you did your best and you loved your kids today, that’s all that matters and you’re doing great.

Moms, Your Kids Don't See Your Failures As Failures (They See Magic)

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Mike Reynolds, Everyday Girl Dad | Parent I’d Like You To Know
Parent I'd Like You To Know

Mike Reynolds, Everyday Girl Dad | Parent I’d Like You To Know

by Désirée
written by Désirée

I’ve known Mike of Everyday Girl Dad for… years. Too many to count exactly, and more than enough to have massive respect for him. He’s always been an advocate for strong and progressive dad/daughter relationships, always an outspoken feminist, but in the last year I’ve seen him get much-deserved recognition for, of all things, cross stitch! And I just love all of it. I love what he’s doing, and I love that he’s being seen for it. So, enough ramble typing from me, here’s another Parent I’d Like You To Know– Mike Reynolds.

Mike Reynolds, Everyday Girl Dad | Parent I’d Like You To Know

Cross stitch, huh? It’s so fun and so unexpected… what made you give it a go? What do you love most about it?

I’ve always been on the lookout for the visual art that matched up with my visual art talent. I tried painting and drawing and was pretty middling (that’s being generous) at all of this. And I had seen so many cool feminist cross-stitch pieces that served as resistance art that I thought maybe cross-stitch was the thing. So I did a Michelle Obama cross-stitch piece and realized 1) how much I loved the finished result, and 2) how good it was for managing my anxiety, and have been doing it for about eight months now. My daughter now likes to remind me how “bad” the first piece I did looks, but they both enjoy the pieces I’ve done since I’ve become a little bit more proficient.

You’re not simply cross stitching typical things, your patterns and pieces have a really important message behind them. Can you tell us more about that?

One thing I talk about is the need for men to do things that interest them. Cross-stitching is not the most stereotypical dad hobby. But it is something I love to do so I do it often and openly. And beyond that, the pieces I do have for the most part fallen into my Rad Women in Cross-stitch Form Project. I started designing my own patterns when I couldn’t find one for Shuri from Black Panther, who our whole family loves. Once I created one pattern I figured why not make patterns for as many of the awesome women- both historical and fictional- who we love to look up to. And the men I’ve done, men like Mr. Rogers, Newt Scamander, and Jean-Luc Picard, represent the kinds of gentle masculinity I like to talk about.

As an Everyday Girl Dad, what is one piece of advice you’d pass onto first-time parents of girls or boys?

Be aware of how early we have a tendency to treat kids differently depending on their assigned gender. Think of the things you say to your kids and also think of the way you talk about yourself and your relationships in front of your kids. Make sure boys have men and women as role models and the same for girls.

You can find Mike on Instagram as @everydaygirldad, find his writing at puzzlingposts.com, and his shop where he sells his cross stitches and more at everydaygirldad.com.

This is part of a new #ParentIdLikeYouToKnow series where I’ll share some of my favorite parents who are making and doing amazing things. I hope you’ll stay tuned!

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The "Mom Brain" Fashion Statements We Never Meant To Make
Parenting LOLZ

The “Mom Brain” Fashion Statements We Never Meant To Make

by Désirée
written by Désirée

The phrase “mom brain” or “baby brain” gets tossed around a lot, especially during those first years of parenthood when sleep is at a premium and our minds feel a bit like mush.

But I think we can admit there’s a ring of truth to it when we do something like leave our travel mug on top of the car and drive away, or put our phone charger in the freezer, or realize in the parking lot of Target that (oops) you’re still wearing your nursing pyjama top and no bra.

We asked on our Facebook page:

Have you ever left your house wearing something that you didn’t mean to be wearing? Pyjamas, slippers, mismatched shoes, no shoes… that sort of thing?

Here’s what you had to say!

“I spent three hours teaching one morning with a pair of black lace panties twisted into my scarf. I grabbed the scarf off the floor of my closet in a hurry and managed to stick my head through the leg hole of the panties. The scarf was annoying me until I figured out it wasn’t part of my scarf, but the hitchhiking panties, and had to get them off from around my neck without my classroom full of juniors noticing.” – Julie

“I was only driving no plans to get out of car so of course I said “eff the bra”… Also happened to be wearing a tank with very large arm holes for night nursing purposes. Wondered why passerby at the convenience store parking lot were giving me funny looks… My boob was totally hanging out and I’m just sitting in my car, ho-hum, waiting for my boyfriend to bring me a Red Bull.” – Jacqueline

The "Mom Brain" Fashion Statements We Never Meant To Make

“My son used his sister’s headband and decorated it with pipe cleaners and beads as his antennae as part of his caterpillar costume for his starring role in his class production of The Very Hungry Caterpillar on the last day of school. At the end he gave them to me to wear. I promptly forgot. As room parent I gathered the children, made a little speech, and helped them present- in front of all their parents- the gifts we’d purchased for their teachers. We had a little party where I mingled with the other parents. I stopped at the convenience store and then the PO Box at the post office on my way to work. It wasn’t until my first meeting of the day that one of my employees asked about my headgear and I reached up to feel what she was talking about that I realized… caterpillar antennae!” – Meghanne

“I forgotten my shoes a couple times… I’ll get all the kids dressed and ready and herd them all into the car- buckle them in safely and drive to where I’m going and only when I step out of the car do I realize that I’m not wearing any shoes so I can’t go in ? Newborn sleep deprivation is real.” – Crystal

“After my daughter was born I drove to the store in a pajama shirt. I remembered to change my pants, but I guess got distracted and forgot about my shirt. I didn’t realize until I was at the store. ???? I use to forget my coat all the time, getting everyone in the car was so hectic and crazy I wouldn’t notice till we were getting out of the car at our destination I had no coat and was freezing.” – Rachel

“I once left a friends house WITHOUT MY SHOES. I remembered the baby, though!” – Christina

“I’ve accidentally worn slippers to the grocery store multiple times. But my favorite was the time I looked down in the checkout line and realized I was wearing one slipper and one sandal. Whoops.” – Audrey

“I grabbed my shoes while running late for work one morning. Ended up grabbing not only two different shoes but also two of the same side. That was an uncomfortable day.” – JA

“Once, in the haze of new motherhood, I got up, got dressed for work, packed the diaper bag, put the baby in the car, got into the car, and then realized I wasn’t wearing pants.” – Miranda

“I left the house wearing these slippers. I had 5 month old triplets at the time, I think I am surprised now, looking back, that this was the worst thing I left the house wearing!” – Claudia

When "Mom Brain" Becomes A Fashion Statement

Thank you to all the awesome moms who shared their stories.

We are SO not alone in our “mom brain” moments! 😉

Solidarity. #fistbump

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Lets Be Nicer To One Another, Ok?
Parenthood

Let’s Be Nicer To One Another, Ok?

by Désirée
written by Désirée

Today we’re sharing a guest post from teacher and mom-of-two, Jennifer Marie. She originally posted this message on Facebook and has given us permission to publish it here.

Lets Be Nicer To One Another, Ok?

Let’s be nicer to one another, ok?

I originally thought this would be a post about parenthood, but it felt like it was bigger than that.

I don’t know if it’s a personal or societal pressure (or both) but honestly, you can’t do it all. I know we feel like sometimes we can but we just can’t.

We can’t be the attentive parent, best friend, coworker, spouse/partner, house keeper, role model, entrepreneur, community leader… all at 100% all the time.

And I beat myself up a lot over this.

Why can’t I be all those things at the exact same time?

Why am I so bad at keeping in touch with friends I used to spend every weekend with or text everyday?

Why is my house always in a state of “oh shit, I need to clean this now before someone stops by!”

Why is my brain is always convincing me I could be be so much more with my kids 24/7 and feeling immense guilt when I don’t?

Why can’t I schedule a weekly date night with my love like they do on TV?

Because we can’t.

And the harder we try to, the quicker we burn out and start to feel like crap.

Even with all the plentiful blessings and wonders around us… we feel like we are lacking. And I know I am not lacking in this life. I don’t have all the monetary riches in the world but I am a very wealthy woman.

So, whether you’re baby is a real living person, your business you built, a fur baby, an empire, be gentle on yourself and those around you.

Because if we start small in our own circles, then it will slowly ripple out to a bigger pool and maybe one day we won’t feel the need to compare to some imaginary standard that none of us are reaching. ??

Thank you again, Jennifer, for letting us share your words.

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Moms, You Don't Have To Go Through Divorce Alone
Parenthood

Moms, You Don’t Have To Go Through Divorce Alone

by Désirée
written by Désirée

Going through a divorce is never easy. Even in simple cases, the path can be confusing and emotional. Thankfully, it’s 2018 and you don’t have to go through your divorce alone. Where our parents might have tried to gloss over the reality of dissolving a marriage, if you’re facing a separation right now, know that there are options to help you navigate the terrain.

Today I want to introduce you to someone who has a passion for helping moms through the haze of divorce. Jessica Ashely, the Divorce Coach for Moms, is dedicated to making sure that moms have the support they need during a super stressful time.

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Photos Are A Life Treasure
ParenthoodPhotography

Moms, Direct Your Own Photos

by Jill
written by Jill

Sometimes it’s like this, moms:

1. You hand the camera to someone else.

2. You say exactly what you want them to capture.

3. You ask nicely that they please try to capture a flattering angle.

4. But most of all, that they just take a TON OF SHOTS because you are more likely to love one if there are many to choose from.

You take control and you tell people, “Hey! I need a picture with the baby. So here’s the camera. And here’s what I want the picture to look like.” And you don’t delete the shots, even if you think you hate all of them, ok? Don’t look at them for a few months (or years!) if you must. I promise they will age beautifully.

Get the Picture Play eBook and Learn how to take and edited photos on your phone like a pro

It may feel weird in that moment, saying you want someone to take a picture of YOU. I think we stigmatize women wanting photos of themselves in a moment, especially when that moment isn’t a major milestone.

And I think a lot of us have a real barrier up when it comes to asking for this. I know I do! We wish and hope our partners will finally just pick up the camera, and there are tons of posts and articles advising people to take pictures of moms when they don’t ask.

But I’m here to tell you- ASK. And try not to be mad that you had to ask. Don’t just ask, DIRECT. Tell them the picture you wish to have.

Related: Moms, If This Father Is Your Partner, Wake The Hell Up

If your partner is anything like my husband, they will be 1. so glad you reminded them and 2. so glad you told them how to frame up the shot and what you really want.

You can’t rely on someone else to give this gift to you. You give it to yourself. And you give it to your baby. You both deserve it.

Photos are a life treasure, and they are guaranteed to appreciate in value as time goes on. Think about it! They are the most sound investment you can ever make.

So invest.

Be intentional.

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What One Mom Wants The World To Know About Parenting A Child Autism
Parenthood

What One Mom Wants The World To Know About Parenting A Child With Autism

by Désirée
written by Désirée

Being judged by strangers tends to come hand in hand with being a parent. No matter what you do, someone out there will probably disagree and let you know in their own way.

Often it’s as innocuous as “shouldn’t she being wearing socks?” but there are other times when it’s not only hurtful, it’s shockingly cruel.

The mother of a child with autism recently posted this story on Twitter and gave us permission to share it here with you.

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Playgroup Week #13: The Best Baby Stuff You Can’t Get At A Baby Store
Playgroup

Playgroup Week #13: The Best Baby Stuff You Can’t Get At A Baby Store

by Désirée
written by Désirée

What do you REALLY need when you have a new baby? This is a loaded question because it definitely changes from family to family… and baby to baby sometimes!

In this week’s episode of the Baby Rabies Playgroup, I’m sharing some of my favorite baby and parenting things that you can’t buy a baby store… including one that you might actually buy at a pet supply store. (Ha!)

 

Below I’m sharing a list of some of the items I mention in the video. Package them all together and you’ve got yourself one heck of a baby shower gift!

The Best Baby Stuff You Can’t Get At A Baby Store

What?

A really nice set of sheets that fit their bed, washed with a scent free laundry soap.

Why?

Because you’re ALWAYS in your bed and you go through so many sheets as a new mom. Bodily fluids everywhere, people! You can gift this along with other items, including the laundry soap you used to wash them. (It’s great to wash it first for them so they don’t have to worry about doing more laundry themselves!)

What?

A cooler bag filled with frozen meals (like the ones from Good Food Made Simple) are amazing.

Why?

Moms forget to eat, it’s hard to get food prepped when you’re feeding and snuggling a baby around the clock, and meals that can be eaten with one hand are GOLD. You could also bring a tray of sandwiches, or fruit and veggies, or a cracker tray… anything that makes it easier for mom to get what she needs. (New moms straight up FORGET to eat. It’s a fact.)

Related: 5 Ways To Save Money When You Have A Baby

What?

Instead of fancy gift wrap, package up your presents in a laundry basket.

Why?

You might feel weird gifting a laundry basket, but they will USE it for sure, and not just for laundry. They’re great for storing toys and stuffed animals, the low-sided baskets are fun for babies to push around or be pushed around in (safely, of course), and you can really never have ENOUGH laundry baskets. You could use this to wrap any gift… just load it up and add a bow if you want!

Playgroup Week #13: The Best Baby Stuff You Can't Get At A Baby Store

What?

Fish net. No joke.

Why?

I have a feeling you can probably guess what this is for… and it has to do with bath time. Yup, bath time floaters. Especially for first time moms, it’s a great way to welcome someone to the club 😉 We’re all in this together!

If you have any ideas for awesome baby and parent gifts that you won’t find on the shelves at your local baby shop, share them in the comments!

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