Well, she’s 3 months old. She went and left newborn-ness behind, and, hell, she’s as big as some one-year-olds (at least 16-17 lbs, I’m guessing). She’s 1/4 of the way through her first year, and I still feel like I’m trying to figure this whole “mother of 2” thing out.
Yeah, I have good days when I think I’m going to get a lot accomplished (and by “a lot” I mean getting dressed, brushing my teeth, tidying the house AND returning some emails), but most of the time they go to hell by 3 in the afternoon when I’m so completely wiped out that I’m forced to nap, thus sucking any remaining productivity from my body.
There’s so much different this time around, and lately I’ve been feeling a little shitty about not being as involved with Leyna as I was with Kendall. Tummy time? It almost never happens. Mainly because I can’t just leave her laying on the floor while I try to get other things done. She spends a lot of time in the car, at the grocery store, running errands. I don’t have the luxury of just sitting around the house with her all day, dangling shiny things in front of her to entice her to reach with purpose and roll over.
I haven’t cracked open a single book about baby development since she was born. I have no freaking clue if she’s hitting her milestones… at least not according to the books. According to ME, she’s golden. She’s smiling and pulling my hair out and hitting my boobs with her little fists when she breastfeeds. How many dirty and wet diapers? Oh hell if I know. Enough to equal a load of diapers every other day. Sounds pretty normal to me. And while I’ll have no idea how many times a day she eats when the pediatrician asks me next month, and I’ll probably just pull a random number out of my ass, she’s clearly eating enough.
Okay, so maybe we aren’t working on the “traditional” goals for a 3 month old you’d find in What To Expect The First Year, but it doesn’t mean she’s missing out on early enrichment. For one, she LOVES to watch HGTV, DIY Network and (her favorite!) Nate Berkus with me. Not lying, folks. This girl lives for a good home improvement show. I see a bright future for her as an interior designer, landscaper or architect. See? A little early career prep.
She also enjoys watching Teen Mom with me, and I take every opportunity to point out to her that all actions have a consequence, that 90% of 16 year old boys are giant douche bags, and that mommy would, of course, be supportive of her if she chose to become a nun… or a lesbian.
I may remember life before her, but I can’t imagine it without her. And though I may not be able to devote 100% of my time to her, like I did with Kendall, I give her 100% of my heart… all the while simultaneously giving Kendall 100% of my heart. The heart is fucking awesome like that.
Kendall is ridiculously close to turning 3 (like a month shy), and Leyna is 3 months and 1 day old.