After years trapped in a love/hate relationship with, selling my soul to the pacifier, we are done!
Like, just in the last week.
Not for the last year like I originally planned.
Yes, she is 4+. No, I honestly didn’t care. Once I embraced the sweet taste of sanity and gave up trying to pry the precious away from her last year, I just didn’t have it in me to worry if she sucked on it until college.
But then! Breakthrough. THIS is the secret you’ve all been waiting for!
We went on a cruise last week.
(Oh, did you not see that all over my Instagram account? #BRCarnivalCruise if you’re interested, but I’ll also be blogging about it all here soon, too. So equal opportunity for everyone to hate me!)
I had this brilliantly stupid idea to pretend we forgot her paci at home after we embarked on 7 days at sea.
OF COURSE I ACTUALLY BROUGHT IT WITH ME, YOU GUYS. OMGOFCOURSE. But we hid it.
The thing about cruising is it sucked the life out of our children by 8 pm every night. And also us. It definitely wiped all of us out.
So on the first night, she cried a little bit for it, but we explained that we accidentally left it at home, and that we were so very sorry. She passed out about 5 minutes later.
She didn’t ask for it once the rest of the trip. NOT ONCE.
On the drive back home, she mentioned she was excited to sleep with paci again that night. I froze in fear, terrified she’d put up a fight now that she knows Target, the Paci village, is 3 miles away.
She cried for a few minutes when I hastily made the Paci Fairy out to be the bad guy- “But Leyna! You did so well without your paci on the ship that the Paci Fairy decided you didn’t need them anymore!”
She truly hates the Paci Fairy. I don’t blame her. Who DOES that? Not me. Definitely not her loving mother.
Anyway, the point here is this:
To get your child to stop begging for their pacifier, book a 7 night cruise, and hide the pacifier in a life jacket in your cabin.
Oh sure, it may cost you thousands, but won’t dental work or whatever down the road… possibly? You’re just… investing up front.
I am so professional at this parenting thing. Expert level unlocked.