climb out of the darkness

Postpartum Anxiety Will Happen Again, And I’m Going To Be Fine
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Postpartum Anxiety Will Happen Again, And I’m Going To Be Fine

by Jill
written by Jill

“Aren’t you scared it will happen again?”

That’s a question a few have asked since announcing my 4th pregnancy. I’m not offended by it. I’m open about dealing with postpartum anxiety and OCD. This is a part of my life, and many people know that.

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I pretty much know it will come back because it always does. I think it was there after my first, and I was able to manage it without a diagnosis because… I guess I just white knuckled my way through it with only one child to take care of.

I know it was the worst it’s ever been after my second. And then? I found Postpartum Progress, and I recognized the symptoms in me, and realized this had less to do with my ability to mother and more to do with needing help.

After my 3rd, it came back, and I knew it. I saw it. I looked it in the face, told it to fuck off, and called my doctor. I was on Lexapro within a day.

And this time, I’m just as prepared all because I KNOW what it looks like, I know where to go, I know I have support.

I’m not scared because I’m empowered. I’m empowered because of Postpartum Progress.

So here I am, for the third year, asking you to help me support this organization that does more than anyone to empower and educate people about maternal mental health, and then moves those people to take action.

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It’s time for the 3rd annual Climb Out Of The Darkness fundraiser, and while I’ll be climbing from the elliptical at my local gym, it’s not too late for any of you to find a team near you or start your own!

If you can’t participate in that way, I would love for you to consider donating to my COTD page. My goal is $500, and this year I’ve teamed up with the lovely Samantha Auburn of Auburn Jewelry to give one custom sterling silver pendant to one donor, to be drawn at random on Jun 30th.

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I’ll leave you with this video I created for Postpartum Progress last year, with the help of their 2015 & 2016 Warrior Moms Conference sponsor Cotton Babies.

Postpartum Progress is saving lives. Please help us reach more people by supporting the Climb today! You can read more about Climb Out Of The Darkness here.

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We’ve Still Got A Lot Of Fight Left- For My Fellow Warrior Moms
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We’ve Still Got A Lot Of Fight Left- For My Fellow Warrior Moms

by Jill
written by Jill

It’s June. It’s almost halfway through June! And I feel terrible that I’m just now writing about this, organizing, this, ASKING YOUR HELP for this.

See, I was going to get together a giveaway of some kind, where anyone who donates money to help me support Postpartum Progress– the organization that has helped me, changed me, saved me as I’ve struggled with postpartum anxiety and OCD- would be entered to win cool prizes.

But part of my self-care plan has been saying NO to a lot of things, and stepping away when I feel overwhelmed. So I am stepping away from the idea that I’m finally going to pull off that big, grand giveaway. The one I was sure would help me raise over $500 for Postpartum Progress’ Climb Out Of The Darkness campaign by June 20th. 

I’m simply asking you- YOU- and you, and any of you, all of you? Whoever of you can spare $5 or $25 or more. I’m asking you to just simply donate to my fundraising efforts.

Not because I have jazzy strollers to giveaway or fancy handbags, but because this means SO much to me.

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My postpartum anxiety peaked after I had my 2nd baby- Leyna. Here we are, in the thick of it. A picture I haven’t looked at in years. I remember thinking the answer to everything was to never leave the house again. I truly thought that was an actual solution.

It not only means the world to me because of what I’ve been through (read more here, here, here, here) but because I KNOW so many of you are, have, or will go through it, too.

1 in 7 pregnant & new moms will have a perinatal mood or anxiety disorder.

One in SEVEN, y’all.

I want Postpartum Progress to continue to be the go-to resource for women who are struggling, who are up at 2 am, googling things like “I can’t stop these visions of my child dying,” or “I’m so angry and I don’t know why,” or “Why am I a terrible mother?”

I want their New Mom Checklist to be accessible far and wide, I want their Plain Mama English Symptoms of Postpartum Depression & Anxiety to get seen by as many moms and dads and caregivers as possible. And I want them to continue to grow, to help parents in ways they so desperately want to, but need funds to do so.

My wish is that you’ll crank up your speakers and watch this video. These are women, families, CHILDREN who have already been helped by this immensely valuable organization.

I want you to share it with anyone and everyone. Not so people will donate (though, of course, it would be lovely if they did) but so anyone out there who is in the trenches of postpartum depression, anxiety, ocd or psychosis will have the chance to see that there is a way through this, to hear that we believe in them and in the fight that is left in them. 

And, momma? If that warrior is you? You got this. You do. There is an entire community out here willing and ready to support you and cheer you on.

Of course, I would also love if you’d support my fundraising efforts. You can visit my Crowdrise page here. Thank you a million times for donating, sharing, and supporting however you can. Even if there’s no chance of winning a fancy prize this time.

 

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Help Me Raise Money For Postpartum Progress, Win Cool Stuff From Joovy

by Jill
written by Jill

I have a confession to make. When I first started blogging, started really getting to know the sphere of parenting bloggers, and got to know other moms on Twitter, I noticed quite a few of them talked about struggles with postpartum depression/anxiety. Like, a fairly high percentage of the women I knew online.

I hate to admit that for a time I thought it was “trendy,” something these women were deciding to blame stress on. God, I really hate typing that out loud. I hate putting that admission out to the public. It’s not that I thought any of them were making things up. I just figured some were trying to latch onto PPD  so they could give their struggles a name. I mean, there were just so many. That couldn’t possibly be true- that they were ALL struggling with some form of postpartum mental disorder.

What I didn’t realize at the time was what a debt I would owe to those women who were speaking out, sharing their struggles and calling them what they REALLY were. I didn’t realize that a few years later, I would be one of them. And a few years after that I would be one of them again. Without them, I would have never recognized myself in this list of Symptoms of Postpartum Depression & Anxiety (In Plain Mama English).

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PPMDs are not “trendy.” You may hear more and more women speaking out about their struggles, but I assure it’s not because it’s a cool club. I thank God for the women who have come before me, who have shared their stories, who continue to put faces to postpartum mental disorders like postpartum depression, anxiety, OCD, and psychosis.

We are talking about them more because they need to be talked about, beyond the sensationalist coverage they get every time a mom harms or kills her children and/or herself. We are talking about them more because we are part of a movement, because we were helped by the women who talked about them before us.

We are all climbing out of this together. We are reaching out to grab the hands of more women with a PPMD than have been reached out to ever before. We are not going to stop talking about them. We’re not going to stop climbing.

This video of Warrior Moms who’ve climbed out before, who are back in the world again, fills my heart with joy! Mothers, we can do this. If you’re struggling, you can climb out. You WILL get the old you back.

A HUGE thanks to David Gray for letting us use his song “Back In The World Again” from his new album Mutineers for this video. It’s. So. Perfect. 

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Now, we need your help…

whether you’ve been personally impacted or not. Do you know and love a mother in your life? Or a woman or girl who may become a mother? Then this is personal to you.

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Please consider donating to the Postpartum Progress annual Climb Out of the Darkness fundraiser. On June 21st, I’ll be hiking with my family, and reaching out to other local moms who are also climbing out of their own struggles.

My goal is to raise $5,000 to support the cause.

Will you please consider donating $10? Will you “buy” me lunch? Each $10 or more donation enters you into a drawing for one of several awesome prizes, donated by Joovy. They are thrilled to support this community and this cause, and I’m so appreciative.

Here’s what up for grabs:

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Joovy Too Fold Stroller– An all-in-one all-terrain stroller valued at $800

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Joovy Spoon– A contemporary walker (which Lowell is OBSESSED with) valued at $100

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Joovy Boob Gift Set– A bottle set, including nipples and breast pump adapters valued at $130

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Joovy Loo Potty and StepTool valued at $60 together

To be entered to win these prizes, you must donate through my page here. If you’d like to join my team, you can also do so at this link!

Since donations will be accepted through the 30th, I will announce winners the first week of July. Thank you in advance for any and all support, for any way you can help spread the word, and for all the love and support  y’all have shown me in the past as I’ve written about my battle with postpartum anxiety and intrusive thoughts.

Mostly, thank you to the women who spoke out and climbed out before me, the ones who reached a hand out to me and continue to help me climb out today.

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