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Baby Rabies

pregnancy & parenting

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      December 6, 2018

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      November 27, 2018

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      November 19, 2018

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      December 19, 2018

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      October 1, 2018

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      August 22, 2018

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4 years old

School Age Days

Hurry! Before he gets here! Why Chuck E. Cheese needs to ditch the rat.

by Jill February 17, 2015
written by Jill

When my sister Kelly was little, she was terrified of Shamu. Not the actual whale, but the walking character at the park. My mom tried to ease her fears by assuring her, “Honey, it’s okay. It’s just a man inside there.”

“OH MY GOD, YOU GUYS! HE ATE A MAN?! WHY IS THAT OKAY? HE’S JUST LIKE, SWIMMING AROUND IN HIS BELLY??? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?” was her terror-filled response.

We’ve always known Leyna is Kelly’s mini-soul. As a baby, Leyna looked at Aunt Kelly with suspicion and stayed at a distance, likely because she knows what her spirit is all about. It lives in her, too.

Her tantrums come from a lineage they share, and this morning she shushed us as we said good morning with, “You’re hurting my ears.” 

Aunt Kelly (in for a visit), also not a morning person, has vowed to adopt the very same response for anyone before 11 a.m. from now on.

So Leyna’s response at Chuck E. Cheese last weekend can be blamed on genetics, to a degree…

***********************

On Sunday morning, we were invited to a party for one of Leyna’s classmates at the local Chuck E Cheese. To my surprise, the place had all new games and rides, and maybe even new carpet? I mean, it smelled a lot less like feet than the last time I was there.

It was pleasant. Leyna had a great time playing games, and was mostly happy until it was time to sit down for pizza and cake.

chuckecheese

Ominous photo is ominous.

Okay, so the birthday tables are all near a stage with a giant animatronic Chuck E. Cheese with shifty eyes.

Can we just discuss why is it our society hasn’t progressed beyond animatronics that are as horrifying as I recall from my own childhood, back when we still had to rewind VHS before returning them to Blockbuster?

I mean, we have the internet and Hulu now. Our babies can operate iPads by they time they are 1. Please take and burn every animatronic character. The children are more advanced now. KEEP UP.

“I don’t want him looking at me, “ she said while nervously clinging to me.

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Source

I did my best to block her view of his shifty, shady eyes and robotic motions while she happily scarfed down pizza and orange soda.

Then the attendant brought out the cake, and excitedly said, “Is everyone ready for Chuck E Cheese to come out and dance with you?!”

Within a minute we went from a happy, normal 4 year old to a SCARED OUT OF HER DAMN MIND.

“No, I don’t want to see him,” she said over and over. I offered to take her to the other side of the room to play more games when he came out, but instead she started yelling at the attendant- “DON’T LET HIM COME OUT! TELL HIM NOT TO COME OUT!”

“Mommy, we have to go get in the car.”

“Well, if we get in the car we have to go home,” I said, thinking that would calm her because we hadn’t even had cake yet so obviously that should work.

“Okay. We go home now. Let’s go,” and she got up and started RUNNING to the exit.

I’m emptying my pockets of tickets and tokens and apologizing to the hosts, wishing the little boy a happy birthday, and she is screaming over her shoulder, “HURRY BEFORE HE GETS HERE!”

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Source

That escalated quickly.

*****

I think we need to address WHY DOES THE ACTUAL CHUCK E CHEESE EXIST? 

Let’s ignore the fact that there is only ONE giant personified rodent that anyone likes. He’s been engrained in our brains and culture long before any of our kids were born, and HE’S CUTE. It’s something about the ratio of the ears to eyes, and maybe because he’s short?

The CEC… rat?? Is not. Not cute. And so tall and skinny and scary looking. And our kids don’t see him enough to feel like, Oh hey! That’s the rat that’s printed on my training pants and yogurt container!

If you’re not going to really up your branding efforts, CEC, and get the kids used to your rodent from a very young age, you need to just…. not… with that.

I vote that you just stop with the mascot thing altogether. No more costumes, no more paying employees to dress up in the costume. No more animatronic rats with shifty eyes. No more. Stop.

Honestly, the place really wasn’t bad. It was fun! It was clean! It didn’t smell like feet! All was going fine. UNTIL THE RAT.

Like, why don’t you adopt a chunk of cheddar as your mascot? Don’t give it eyes or make anyone dress up like it. Just a giant, soft chunk of fake cheese. The kids can hug it. Or not.

I want to like you! And I want my daughter to not run, screaming from you.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE IS A MAN IN THAT MOUSE?? OMG, YOU GUYS. LIKE, HE ATE HIM? HURRY BEFORE HE GETS HERE?

Source

February 17, 2015 13 comments
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School Age DaysThe Story

I Didn’t Know Tooth Fairies Visit 4 Year Olds

by Jill March 12, 2013
written by Jill

The thing about growing up is you don’t realize it’s happening. You only realize it’s happened. Like when your FOUR YEAR OLD loses his first tooth.

The first day of Spring Break started off as well as I could have hoped. I woke up to a clean house (a rarity), and felt generous enough to sacrifice a piece of that by letting the kids play Playdoh while I worked on laundry.

I figured it would be a great day to document some small, ordinary moments. I haven’t done that in a while. So I got my camera out and set it on the bar after I snapped a couple pics of them playing nicely.

Minutes after I took that picture, Kendall said, “Hey mom… look… at my tooth.” I turned to see him with his hand in his mouth. I assumed he was pretending a piece of Playdoh was a loose tooth… or something. I don’t know what I thought was going on, but I DID NOT think his real tooth was falling out.

“You’re so silly,” I joked, then turned back around.

“Mom… mom… look… look,” he said, and then thrust his hand out. In it was not a colorful piece of Playdoh, but something small and white.

Wait… we don’t have any white Playdoh… I slowly walked over to him, my head cocked to the side, squinty eyes.

“Kendall, where did you get that?” I stupidly asked, fully in denial.

“From my mouth,” he replied after giving me a totally deserved are-you-serious look. I looked up, and then I saw the black shadow where a tooth once was. I had no idea how to react so, naturally, I said, “Wait… let me get my camera!”

“Smile! Show me your teeth!” I nervously commanded with cheer. He struggled…

Then my string of questions set in.

“What happened? Did you hit your mouth? Does it hurt? Has it been loose for a long time?”

I’ll be totally honest. The horror that was bubbling up inside me was showing on my face. I just wasn’t prepared for this. I had no idea if it’s even normal for 4 year olds to lose teeth. Was he sick? Had we failed dental hygiene for preschoolers? I quickly inspected his tooth for any signs of decay that would make it fall out.

It was then that I realized how much I fail… just absolutely fail in the Keep Calm department when others are struggling. Here I was freaking out because I wasn’t ready for this, and poor Kendall knew even less about what was happening.

“Mom,” he said through tears, “can we put it back in? Can we go to the doctor and have him fix it?”

“Oh! Oh, honey. Oh, it’s okay! This is okay! This is normal. This is supposed to happen! You have another tooth… a grown-up tooth because you’re getting SO grown up! It will grow in it’s place,” I said in that high-pitched voice that’s my default when I panic.

Oh SURE it’s “normal” mom. YOU’RE TOTALLY ACTING LIKE THIS IS COMPLETELY NORMAL RIGHT NOW.  <<What I’m sure he was thinking on some level.

****

Note to self: Have the period talk with Leyna and prepare yourself WAY BEFORE you think all that will go down. Horrified, caught off guard faces that you physically can’t hide will ruin SO MANY LIVES when that happens.

****

“But mom, why do I have to lose my tooth? I don’t want a new one.”

And thus started the conversation we are still having- the whys and the hows and the whens.

I had to scramble to come up with what the Tooth Fairy in our house would do last night. Scott and I settled on a letter, a new toothbrush and toothpaste (needed anyway), and 4 gold $1 coins for the first tooth. We figured we’d do $2 for every tooth after this. We really have no idea what we’re doing, but the plan sounded okay at 10 p.m. last night.

Hat tip to the Facebook commenter who mentioned the ass-saving idea to put in a clause about how the tooth fairy can be a day or two late sometimes.

This morning, instead of excitedly running to our room, holding his loot up with joy, he muttered, “Mom, the tooth fairy didn’t bring me a new tooth.”

When I explained that’s not what the tooth fairy does, and that it would just have to grow in, and that takes time- he looked at me very suspicious of the whole tooth fairy thing. I mean, just what the hell IS her job, then, if not to bring you a tooth to replace the one she’s taking?

He eventually warmed up to the goodies, and I think he’s getting more comfortable with the extra space in his mouth. My biggest regret though all of this is simply not preparing myself for this. And not in the “I don’t have a cute tooth fairy pillow for him!” sense, but in the sense that, as a parent, I just wasn’t even in that space yet.

He’s FOUR. He’ll be 5 in May, but still, he’s FOUR. He’s in preschool. I thought loose teeth were a kindergarten and beyond thing, not a preschool thing.

After some internet hysterics on my part, a lot of people chimed in to tell me that it’s totally normal to lose teeth this early, especially if he got them all early, too. He did. I swear, he started teething out of the womb, had quite a few by 6 months, and all but his 2 year old molars in by his 1st birthday. The tooth he lost, bottom right, was actually the first tooth he got in. So all that makes me feel a little better.

Upon further interrogation, he revealed the tooth came out after he tried to take a Playdoh lid off the canister with his mouth. Something, I’ll confess, he saw me do minutes before.

Did I know it was loose? No. I guess looking back there were maybe a few small signs, but that kid always has his hands in his mouth, and his pain tolerance is so high. He never tells us when little things like that are bothering him.

So, lesson learned. Growing up happens. It’s happening right now.  It’s happening whether we want it to or not, whether we’re prepared or not. Sooner or later (or so much sooner than you ever thought) it happens.  Now, go talk to your 3 and 4 year olds about how TOTALLY NORMAL it will be when their teeth start falling out.

March 12, 2013 24 comments
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PhotographyThe Story

They Sleep So We Can Regroup

by Jill March 5, 2013
written by Jill

Let’s do better tomorrow, little man. Both of us. Let’s do better tomorrow.

Taken with my Canon 6D, uploaded to and edited on my iPhone with the Snapseed app. Technology makes me happy. Pushy 4 year olds and limited tempers from both of us do not. Here’s to another day.

March 5, 2013 11 comments
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