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      November 19, 2018

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      September 4, 2017

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Baby Rabies

pregnancy & parenting

  • Start Here
    • About Baby Rabies
    • Baby Registry Top Picks
    • Favorite Pregnancy Apps
  • The Book
  • Pregnancy
    • Birth Stories
    • Perinatal Mood Disorders
  • Parenthood
    • Babies
    • Toddlers
    • School Age Kids
    • Parenting LOLZ
  • Photography
    • Photography

      6 Stunning Photos You Would Never Guess Were…

      February 11, 2019

      Photography

      Simple Tips For Editing Snow Photos On Your…

      December 13, 2018

      Photography

      I Wrote A Photography eBook And This Is…

      December 6, 2018

      Photography

      Creative Lighting Ideas To Help You Take Great…

      November 27, 2018

      Photography

      Learn How To Take And Edit Photos On…

      November 19, 2018

  • Reviews
    • Reviews

      The Answer To Last Minute Holiday Gifting For…

      December 19, 2018

      Reviews

      I Was Never A Barbie Girl Until Now

      October 1, 2018

      Reviews

      Finally! Jeans For My Jean-Averse Kids!

      August 22, 2018

      Reviews

      If Your Kid Loves Dump Trucks & Garbage…

      August 13, 2018

      Reviews

      Nobody Tell My Kids ABC Mouse Is Part…

      September 4, 2017

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Videos

My Biggest Parenting Mistake Ever
Baby Rabies on YouTubeParenthoodPostpartum Anxiety & DepressionVideos

My Biggest Parenting Mistake Ever

by Jill October 2, 2018
written by Jill

Today is the day I re-launch the Baby Rabies Blog YouTube channel! Note: it’s not the “Baby Rabies” channel because someone else has that one, so if you search for it, be sure to search for Baby Rabies BLOG. Also, when I say “re-launch” I think that’s a little generous. I never really had much of a steady  YouTube channel before. It was more like a library where I stored videos that I intended to mostly promote on Facebook, but now that I’ve been doing YouTube for over 9 months for Happy Loud Life, I feel like I can handle a for-real YT channel for Baby Rabies, too.

Related: Your Baby Registry Doesn’t Have To Be So Stressful

I hesitated to start off with this video in particular because it makes me feel really vulnerable. My mind immediately jumped to all the awful things people would say about me in the comments, and I wanted to push it off and kick things off with something more… fluffy. But, the best moments with Baby Rabies readers have always come from raw and vulnerable moments when I’ve said what I needed to say, knowing some people would judge me for it, and doing my best to focus on the positive connections of shared experiences with readers who need to hear their own experiences mirrored in what I’m saying, or who genuinely learn from what I’ve shared.

So let’s talk mistakes.  What’s your biggest parenting mistake so far?

I think it’s important we talk about these things! Not to feel ashamed. And not to get into that weird thing where people try to one-up each other with how, no really, they are the worst parent.  Do you know what I speak of? Such a bizarre spiral some conversations get into.

But to just be honest with each other, and to talk about what we’ve learned from our mistakes.

I’ll go first. My biggest parenting mistake ever… so far, like 10 years into this, is over-parenting and over-disciplining my first child.

Oh how I miss that baby face!

When I say I over-disciplined, I don’t want you to think I mean, like, I abused him. What I mean is I didn’t give him space to learn the natural consequences of his bad behavior, and I treated all levels of “bad” behavior with the same seriousness.

I am certain that I experienced postpartum anxiety and OCD to a degree after he was born (something I’ve had after the birth of each of my 4 babies, but was first diagnosed with after my 2nd baby was 9 months old). The way my anxiety played out a lot of times was my paranoia about my toddler/young child misbehaving in public and other people’s perception of that.

In the video, I give the example of taking him out to eat, and then spending the whole time at dinner shushing him, correcting him, and generally feeling very tense and on edge. I would even shush his happy noises. And here’s the thing, I’m certain there will be people who read this and maybe comment or at least say to others, “Well you SHOULD do that when you take a toddler to a restaurant!” And those were the voices I was very, very concerned about when my son was younger. Not just in the restaurant, but in the grocery store, at the playground, literally everywhere.

Should children be obnoxious and screaming in public? In theory, no. We, as parents, have an obligation to teach them how to behave in public, for sure. I’m not excusing that. But by giving so much weight to those voices and those perceived judgements IN THAT MOMENT, we lost sight of the long-term lesson. My son came to expect that I would always be at level 10, stressed out, and correcting his every move. Always.

So now, when I do need to convey the seriousness of a situation, I feel that I have to escalate things even higher. And that’s something he and I are both working on. I need him to HEAR me without me having to yell at him. And I also want him to experience a mom who is relaxed and happy when we are out. That was a rare thing for him when he was younger.

Instead of over-correcting him and over-disciplining him, I wish I would have let the small things slide more, and not let my fear of other’s perception of me as a mother cloud my rationality when he did act up.

On the over-parenting front, I wish I would have let him be bored more! Y’all know I say that all the time now to parents of babies. Let them be bored! I remember feeling actual guilt over reading a magazine while he was crawling around the living room.

I think some of this came from being a fresh stay-at-home-mom, and feeling like he was my JOB. So I filled his days with Gymboree (which, admittedly, was more for me anyway) and playdates, and story time, and walks, and the playground. I loved playing with my little boy so much. I don’t regret that, but I do wish I felt more comfortable back then letting him explore on his own. I wish I hadn’t felt pressured to manufacture magic for him.

Over-parenting- that’s my biggest mistake… so far. I would love to hear what you think yours is if you feel comfortable sharing, Feel free to either comment on this blog post, or head to the YouTube video and comment there.

And I would LOVE if you’d hit the “Subscribe” button while you’re there! I’m aiming for videos on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Let me know what you’d like to see me talk about or review of show off!

October 2, 2018 2 comments
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Playgroup Week 5: Smartphone Photography Tips
ParenthoodPlaygroupVideos

Playgroup Week 5: Smartphone Photography Tips

by Désirée February 28, 2017
written by Désirée

img_3050

This week’s episode of the Baby Rabies Playgroup is all about getting the best results from your smartphone camera. I love my DSLR, don’t get me wrong, but I’m sure you guys can relate to using your iPhone WAY more for taking pics of your kids.

It’s handy. It’s simple. And in today’s episode and I’m going to show you some of my favorite tips and tricks for taking and editing photos with your phone.

Each week we’ve had some amazing brands to share giveaways with you, and this week is no different. One lucky winner is going to get an awesome prize back from our friends at Bebe au Lait, including:

  • Bebe au Lait Classic Muslin Snuggle Blanket
  • Bebe au Lait Classic Muslin Bedtime Sleeper
  • Bebe au Lait Hooded Towel

I’ll also be taking over the @bebeaulait Instagram TOMORROW (March 1st) to share our day, so get ready for lots of Wallace snapshots 😉

Enter below for your chance to win!

Playgroup Week 5: Smartphone Photography Tips

Playgroup #5 Giveaway: Bebe au Lait

February 28, 2017 0 comment
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Playgroup Week 4: Shake Off The Mom Frump
ParenthoodPlaygroupVideos

Playgroup Week 4: Shake Off The Mom Frump

by Jill February 20, 2017
written by Jill

That Facebook Live Playgroup thing I wanted to do? Well, I’m doing it! And I’ve been doing it for the last 3 weeks, which is about 2 weeks more than I ever commit to most things. 2017 is looking like The Year Of Adulting for me.

If you haven’t had a chance to pop in, you can always catch up by watching the FB live episodes on my FB page.

I’m also going to embed the last few at the bottom of this post and will have a post go up here every week going forward with the previous week’s episode embedded in it. 

This week’s episode is all about shaking off the mom frump with my lovely, talented, gorgeous friend Tiffany Reese of Lookieboo. She’s a bad ass at body positivity and a makeup and hair goddess who also has 3 children and some great tricks for looking and feeling our best while managing parent life.

I try to bring you some awesome giveaways every week, and this week is no exception. I’ve got 3 of my favorite fashion staples lined up to gift to 6 winners.

1 $250 Stitch Fix credit
2 pair of BLANQI leggings (winners’ choice of maternity or high waist/nursing)
3 $30 credits to Nickel & Suede

Baby Rabies Playgroup Week 4 | BabyRabies.com

Playgroup #4 Giveaway

Catch up on the first few Playgroup episodes below!

February 20, 2017 0 comment
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#BerriesEverywhere & Embracing Life’s Messes
Food & WineParenthoodStuffVideos

#BerriesEverywhere & Embracing Life’s Messes

by Jill January 18, 2017
written by Jill

Sponsored by Very Berry Cheerios

Three things we love- berries, Cheerios, making messes. Okay, I don’t really “love” that last one, but when you’re a mom 0f 4 (so crazy to type that!), you have to learn to at least embrace them. Sometimes #BerriesEverywhere is just a fact of life.

Very Berry Cheerios #BerriesEverywhere | BabyRabies.com

We made this video when I was 40 weeks and 1 day pregnant, and I’m not ashamed to say that not only did I have the dog clean up the mess on the floor, but Very Berry Cheerios were our lunch that day. (Watch for Rosie’s video debut!)


We’ve since polished off two boxes because 1. they are DELICIOUS (and I’m not just saying that because I’m breastfeeding and eating EVERYTHING), and 2. cereal is a totally acceptable and easy meal, especially when you’ve got a newborn.

Very Berry Cheerios #BerriesEverywhere | BabyRabies.com

After all, our oldest is kinda a pro at making bowls of cereal for himself and his brother and sister.

Very Berry Cheerios just landed on store shelves, and if you love the taste of real berries in every bite of your cereal, you need to go get you a box or 3. (They’ll go fast if your family is anything like ours.)

Don’t forget to embrace your own mess and share your #BerriesEverywhere moment with us on social media! (And yes, I realize this picture in no way represents any kind of “mess” but if you could see behind me as I took the picture…)

Very Berry Cheerios #BerriesEverywhere | BabyRabies.com

Thanks to Very Berry Cheerios for working with me on this post and video! 

 

January 18, 2017 0 comment
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Share This Video With All The Moms In Your Life Because They Just Might Need To See It – Postpartum Progress PSA
ParenthoodPostpartum Anxiety & DepressionVideos

Share This Video With All The Moms In Your Life Because They Just Might Need To See It – Postpartum Progress PSA

by Jill October 25, 2016
written by Jill

I saw some pictures come up in my Timehop app last week, and I caught my breath.

There was a photo of the Pantages theater in Los Angeles. I was there for a media event, and I spent the entire symphony trying to convince myself nobody was going to push me over the edge of the balcony from 6 rows back.

Then a photo of me holding my then 10 month old daughter. I had a bruise on the front of my leg from rubbing an imaginary “tumor” over and over, convinced I would need my leg amputated, and that I’d probably die and never see her go to kindergarten.

She started kindergarten this year, and I was there.

Share This Video With All The Moms In Your Life | BabyRabies.com

5 years.

5 years ago I was sinking, drowning, felt like I was dying. Literally. I was rock bottom in the pit of postpartum anxiety. And I had no idea that I would ever be able to sit here today, and look at that from a distance. I had no idea what it would feel like to say that was something that happened to me, not who I was, who I am. I didn’t think I’d ever feel any differently.

Then I read The Symptoms of Postpartum Depression & Anxiety in Plain Mama English from PostpartumProgress.com, and to say my life was changed would not even begin to cover it. I was not a bad mother, I was not dying. I was sick, and I could get better.

AND I DID.

(And then I got sick again, and then better again. Click here if you want to read through my journey with postpartum anxiety.)

I will forever be indebted to Postpartum Progress for helping me get out of that incredibly dark place, I’ve been dedicated to helping them share their mission with mothers ever since.

So, for the 2nd year, I am honored to team up with Cotton Babies, a sponsor of the Postpartum Progress Warrior Mom Conference and supporter of all moms, to create a video PSA that we all hope will get seen by countless people all over the world who need to know that there is help for all moms who feel this way.

See last year’s video here.

I wanted the tone for this year’s video to be uplifting and full of hope. 1 in 7 mothers (at the very least) will deal with a perinatal mood & anxiety disorder, like postpartum depression, anxiety, ocd, and psychosis. Our goal is for every single one of those mothers to know that she can get better, she can rise up, and that this does NOT stop her from being a good mother. There are so many of us who have made it through to the other side, and we’re here to throw you a lifesaver.

We are more than the news stories. We are changing lives- our own, and mothers and children around us. We will not be quiet. We will keep shouting about this until all mothers and people who love mothers know that Postpartum Progress is here to help, and to smash the stigma and the shame.

On to the video! I hope you’ll consider sharing this with anyone and everyone you know.

I’ve seen first-hand how few major voices are willing to speak out on our behalf. And by that, I mean brands, pharmaceutical companies, corporations. There are SO MANY people who will NOT touch this cause with a 10 foot pole. I have been behind the scenes, pitching them to sponsor Climb Out Of The Darkness and the Warrior Mom Conference. Many will say they choose to focus their resources on causes that “help children.”

You want to “help children”? There is nothing more important than supporting their mothers. 

Share This Video With All The Moms In Your Life | BabyRabies.com

So it is incredibly moving to me when a brand that I have long loved and used and aligned with steps up and makes a PROUD stance supporting Postpartum Progress and all mothers. I can not thank Cotton Babies enough for their part in all of this. I hope you’ll consider supporting them, too.

Finally, a special thanks to this year’s Warrior Moms who participated in the video.

Share This Video With All The Moms In Your Life | BabyRabies.com

Jessica is a home schooling mother and dedicates herself to being the best she can be for her 3 children.

Share This Video With All The Moms In Your Life | BabyRabies.com

Heather is a mother of 2 who also runs a postpartum support group and leads a Climb Out Of The Darkness climb in her city. 

Share This Video With All The Moms In Your Life | BabyRabies.com

Graeme is a Postpartum Progress Warrior Mom Ambassador and blogs at The Postpartum Mama.  (Photo by Maria White & Matthew Mebane)

October 25, 2016 6 comments
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Your 3 Year Old Can Make Their Own PB&J, Too, With This Magic Tip!
ToddlersVideos

Your 3 Year Old Can Make Their Own PB&J, Too, With This Magic Tip!

by Jill October 3, 2016
written by Jill

I know I’ve written about this before- how my advice to first time parents is simply “IGNORE THEM MORE.” It’s insane when I think about the kind of guilt I let myself feel when I wasn’t orchestrating every moment of my first born’s early years of life.

Society told me, “You are a stay at home mom, so your job is to enrich your child’s life during all waking hours. Be sure he’s eating the best, learning the most, and never bored.” 

Society is such a lying, destructive asshole to new parents.

My first born is a lovely kid, intelligent, funny. He also lives to be entertained and have things done for him because why wouldn’t he? That’s all he knew.

It’s a much more complex issue than just that, of course. I’m sure my postpartum anxiety comes into play here. I paint this picture as a contrast for you, though.

Lowell, 3rd baby, 3 years old, and he makes his own peanut butter & jelly sandwiches. Literally, from gathering all the stuff from the pantry and refrigerator, to actually putting the thing together. HE DOES IT ALL HIMSELF.

screen-shot-2016-10-03-at-3-31-27-pm

We did not teach him this. I can only guess this is a life skill he picked up after we ignored him to the point of him figuring it out on his own.

Listen, we feed the kid… at appropriate meal and snack times, but not always when he wants.

*Worth mentioning- the first kid would have been making a PB&J with all organic ingredients, and I would have screamed if I found him with a butter knife. 

screen-shot-2016-10-03-at-3-31-08-pm

But do you see the MAGIC that comes from ignoring them???

TEAM IGNORE THE CHILDREN (within appropriate and legal boundaries, of course)

Remarkably Average Parenting - the book

So I wound up getting this video because I had my camera on me and was headed to photograph this book- Remarkably Average Parenting by my friend Ilana Wiles – when I turned the corner to find him doing this. It was 100% NOT STAGED. I was just going to take the picture of the book in the natural light on top of the dining room table (after I opened those blinds). Perfect timing, right? That’s some remarkably average parenting right there, for sure. 

October 3, 2016 9 comments
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Crazy Things That Make Pregnant Women Cry
PregnancyVideos

Crazy Things That Make Pregnant Women Cry

by Jill September 26, 2016
written by Jill

Earlier this summer, back in my lat 1st tri when my hormones were surging and my food aversions were on blast, I asked my Facebook page what were some of the craziest things they’ve ever cried over while pregnant, mostly looking for solidarity because I was an emotional nightmare.

At the time, my husband had committed many crimes against pregnant hormones, including coming home with a Frosty that I desperately craved, only for me to discover their machine obviously had malfunctioned because it was completely melted and made of nothing but foam.

Crazy Things That Make Pregnant Women Cry | BabyRabies.com

And he had one that was the exact same way and sucked it down, not even thinking that this was going to RUIN ME!  It’s like I haven’t had 3 other babies before this with him.

What followed on my FB page was one of the best comment threads ever. I was crying again, but only because I was laughing so hard.

(I finally got around to turning this into a video, which you can watch in full at the end of the post.)

Crazy Things That Make Pregnant Women Cry | BabyRabies.com

Here are just a FEW of my favorites:

“I loved pickle juice while pregnant, and had about 4 jars of varying types that I would drink out of each night… Kosher, Polish, garlic. One night my husband combined them all in 2 jars. I bawled for hours because they were ruined.” – Kristin P.

That must have hurt, Kristin. Truly.

Crazy Things That Make Pregnant Women Cry | BabyRabies.com

“I cried about donuts. Specifically, I’d waiting in link with my 3 year old picking out the perfect donuts for us and then realized at the counter that I didn’t have my wallet. We had to leave them there and I went to the car and cried. It was National Donut Day.” – Gena G.

WHO lets a pregnant walk away from her donut order on NATIONAL DONUT DAY and doesn’t offer to pay the, what, $5 for her??

Crazy Things That Make Pregnant Women Cry | BabyRabies.com

“I got a pedicure the week before I gave birth and the my fee were SO SWOLLEN that the lady tried putting the toe spacers in but decided I didn’t need them. I ugly cried.” – Amanda V.

Bless those poor sausage toes! Laughing WITH you, Amanda. WITH you.

Crazy Things That Make Pregnant Women Cry | BabyRabies.com

“There was a dent in the metal laundry room door. I tried to tap it out with the end of a screwdriver. It didn’t look good so I beat the door senseless with a hammer and made it look like hell. Cried about the mess, and that the door looked even worse.” – Cami L.

The pregnant rage was strong with this one.

Crazy Things That Make Pregnant Women Cry | BabyRabies.com

“I cried when my husband and I were planting a tree for our first baby. Not about the sentiment of watching this tree and my baby grow up together, but because my husband cut a worm in half while digging the hole.” – Brittany C.

That’s some real circle of life stuff, girl.

Crazy Things That Make Pregnant Women Cry | BabyRabies.com

If you’re in the thick of the pregnancy hormone jungle, just know you are not alone.

Crazy Things That Make Pregnant Women Cry | BabyRabies.com

Right now? YES, these are totally LEGIT things making your cry. THIS IS SERIOUS, and we respect that.

In a few months, though, hopefully, you’ll be able to have a good laugh at it.

So… tell me, what is the craziest thing that’s made YOU cry while pregnant?

September 26, 2016 7 comments
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What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman
PregnancyVideos

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman

by Jill September 18, 2016
written by Jill

The guy walked up to me with a look of importance, like whatever he was going to say or ask had been thought out.

“When are you due?”

It was nearly a demand. I mean, I don’t mind sharing my due date, but people aren’t entitled to it, you know?

“Mid December,” I replied quickly and turned around.

Then, with a tone of superiority, and certainly pleasure that he had this information from me now, he responded, “Damn. You SURE it’s not twins?”  and quickly walked off. It’s clear he was set on saying that to me all along. Make no mistake, there was nothing kind about this exchange.

And yet, this is just… something people do? They just openly comment on the state of a pregnant woman’s body whenever they feel like it.

So for those who feel like they MUST say SOMETHING to a very visibly pregnant woman, let me offer you this suggestion.

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

There are really only a few acceptable things to say, stranger who feels compelled to comment on the size of a woman incubating a child.

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

Are you ready? Take notes.

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

“You look amazing!”

It doesn’t matter if she actually looks amazing, okay.

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

I don’t care if she looks like Jabba the Hutt incubating a small planet, you tell her she looks amazing, congratulate her, or you could even tell her she’s glowing.

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

We know we’re not glowing. We know we sweat a lot while lugging around this enormous midsection that you are shocked by. We know we don’t look amazing.

LIE TO US ANYWAY.

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

Because if you’re not going to lie to us, the ONLY other acceptable alternative…

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

Is to keep your mouth shut. Shhh! Say nothing.

Definitely DO NOT ASK US if we’re sure it’s not twins!

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

Or if we’re SURE we’re not having the baby sooner than we think.

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

I promise, there are two things we are CERTAIN of, and it’s the number of inhabitants in our uterus, and when they are expected to GTFO.

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

Oh yeah, and none of that is your business anyway, IF WE’RE BEING HONEST.

So if you’re not going to tell the pregnant woman that she looks amazing, is glowing, or congratulate her, then SHUT UP.

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

Go back to the life you were living before a pregnant woman showed up and shocked you with the size of her belly to the point that you felt the deep desire to say something to her about it.

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

It’s just not appropriate. It’s not funny. You’re not endearing. You’re not making small talk. You’re rude.

Listen, you think you’re shocked? We are VERY aware of how we look. Nobody is more shocked than us.

What (Not) To Say To A Pregnant Woman | BabyRabies.com

We have to see ourselves naked.

Share this video on Facebook! 

September 18, 2016 33 comments
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Take Summer Photos From Snapshot To Frame-Worthy
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Take Summer Photos From Snapshot To Frame-Worthy

by Jill May 17, 2016
written by Jill

Summer is almost here! This is a post I wrote last summer, but I am dusting it off and made a video to go with it because summer is my favorite time of year to take pictures.

tipsforgreatsummperphotos

Watch the video below for 5 tips for great summer photos….

Then click through to last year’s post to see what my 6th tip was, especially those of you with access to photo editing programs.

IMG_0743

 

May 17, 2016 13 comments
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It’s Fine. We’re Excited. We’re Going To Be Fine.
ParenthoodPregnancyVideos

It’s Fine. We’re Excited. We’re Going To Be Fine.

by Jill May 11, 2016
written by Jill

“You can’t do that to me!” That was Scott’s reaction upon receiving the text that I was SUPER OMG SURPRISE pregnant with our 4th baby.

And my response back? “You are the one who did this TO ME!”

He was on day 3 or 4 of a 7 day trip, and was in all day meetings. He said he got the text and looked at it in front of a colleague who immediately figured out what it was and Scott turned bright red. OOPS! GUESS WE WERE BOTH SURPRISED AND CAUGHT OFF GUARD.

He called me about 15 minutes later during a break.

Beyond the initial shock, though, he’s been super thrilled.

4th baby hasn’t been completely off the table. We talked about it and I mostly agreed to it, but the plan was for it to be a later bonus baby. At the very least, it was another year away from consideration. I wanted some distance between this circus and the next.

So as for my reaction? I’m still warming up. I’ve done a lot of crying, but, of course, I’m hopeful and grateful, and I have 8 months to adjust. Everything will be fine.

Now the kids? This is the first time any of them have been old enough to really grasp what this means before seeing an actual baby, I think, so we decided to video their reaction. Brace yourselves! It’s…. nothing too exciting.

In case you couldn’t watch that with the sound on, Leyna wants it to be a girl, Kendall wants it to be a boy, and Lowell wants it to be a Peep. At least 2 of them will have each other to commiserate with.

Screen Shot 2016-05-11 at 12.37.24 PM

May 11, 2016 14 comments
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