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Kelly

On The Eve Of Your First Baby, Sis

by Jill March 5, 2020
March 5, 2020

Kelly,

I want to start by reminding you of the time you drove around Dallas with me and my colicky 4 week old while we went house hunting. You would often keep the car driving in circles while I ran in and out of each prospective home with the agent- because Kendall would scream until he was purple if the car stopped moving. 

On The Eve Of Your First Baby, Sis | BabyRabies.com

Later that night, you helped me prop a hotel hair dryer against the nightstand since white noise apps weren’t a thing back in 2008. We dozed and took turns making sure the dryer didn’t fall, didn’t spark.  I honestly can’t believe we didn’t set that room on fire. 

It was a really hard time to be a new mom with a tiny baby, doing such a big and grownup thing. I didn’t know how to breastfeed him without fumbling yet. I didn’t know how to change him without making a mess of those yellow, seedy diapers that smelled mysteriously like movie popcorn.

I was hanging by a thread, honestly. And then he became inconsolable – AGAIN. This was his thing. He had colic. But there was something about this cry. He was irritated. He was squinting. I looked closer to see an adult eyelash stuck in his glassy blue baby eye. 

I just about lost it. Because how the actual fuck do you go about fixing THAT? Panic set in. The kind I know you’re used to seeing from me for as long as you can remember. I catastrophize. 

You gently took him from me, and as if you had been mothering your whole life, you softly blew into his eye, and he blinked the eyelash right out. 

On The Eve Of Your First Baby, Sis | BabyRabies.com

That was not an exception to who you are. You have comforted babies in the NICU, and blood donors on the floor. You have nannied and au pair-ed. You have stabilized many a drunk photo-booth participant. And you have been the best aunt 4 Krause kids could ask for. 

As if you have been mothering your whole life, because you’re made for this. 

On The Eve Of Your First Baby, Sis | BabyRabies.com

It will not be easy. The mechanics will not come naturally. I sincerely hope if you’ve learned anything from watching me do this 4 times, it’s that perfection is never an option and the pursuit of anything more than “this works” is wasted. 

But the ability to love, to nurture, to mother? You’ve got this. You always have. 

On The Eve Of Your First Baby, Sis | BabyRabies.com

It’s possible you’re very, very, very pregnant and crying reading this right now. I’m sorry! We’ll make the next post a little lighter. Maybe we can talk about texting mucus plug photos? 

I’m so thrilled to see you on this next roller coaster of life, and I can’t wait for you to share some of that through your own personal lens of humor and truth here. Thanks for giving me a niece/nephew, and thanks for taking care of one of my other babies- this blog.

xoxo
Your big sis Jill

Jill Krause & Kelly Williams | Sisters | BabyRabies.com


50 Things to Do Before You Deliver: The First Time Moms Pregnancy Guide
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9 comments

Leyna Williams March 5, 2020 - 9:50 pm

Oh, Jill. Kelly. What a treasure this post is. I’m trying really hard to type past tears. I just love you guys. All the babies are so lucky to have you.

Reply
Jenn March 6, 2020 - 2:31 am

This is so lovey Jill! Best of luck to you, Kelly, as you prepare to meet this new little person as well as the one looking back in the mirror. She will still be you. Just a new you – one who will do things you didn’t know you were capable of, one who will love more than you ever knew was possible, one who will grow and BECOME. ?? You’ve got this.

Reply
Jenn March 6, 2020 - 2:32 am

Uhhhhh don’t know what the ?? are for in my comment. Definitely not a question. 🙂

Reply
Jennifer Stephen November 17, 2020 - 5:00 am

You look so happy. Jill

Reply
Ashley December 22, 2020 - 10:26 pm

My baby is also a treasure of my life. I can feel your happiness. Wish your family all the best and lucks 🙂

Reply
Celeb Networth February 4, 2021 - 9:36 am

I hope to see more from you, thank you for sharing the nice article.

Reply
Berd Connoly August 15, 2021 - 2:45 am

Happiest baby!

Reply
avtubehub May 1, 2022 - 4:06 pm

cute baby, seems so happy

Reply
Ukims July 10, 2022 - 8:49 am

Love is always inherited and cherished no matter who it is

Reply

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