The other day I heard a first-time mom talking about planning her baby’s first birthday party and all the favors she was hand-making, and I was taken right back to my first baby ‘s first birthday and the alien stuffies I sewed up myself to give the other babies coming to the party.
I could feel the mom-of-4 in me laugh at mom-of-one me, and then I told her to STFU because you know what? I love that I did that even though I’d probably never have the time or desire to do it again.
So, in that spirit, I thought I’d share 5 things I’m glad I did with my first baby – no shame- even though I wouldn’t go on to do that again for baby #4 (and sometimes #2 & #3).
1. Cloth Diapers
I love that I cloth diapered him 100%. I was FULLY committed. He was in cloth diapers nearly his whole diapered life, including nights, potty training, and even when we traveled. I would never be able to commit that fully to cloth diapering the other 3, but damn we saved some crazy money on baby #1 by doing that! And we needed it. Our budget was suuuuuper tight when he was a baby.
2. Made Baby Food
I love that I made all of his baby food. It’s important to note here that back then I didn’t have a job. I had this blog, but it was not a business back then and I had a lot more free time. Making his baby food was fun for me. It’s not something I prioritized as my time became more scarce with the other 3, but I’m glad I got to do it when it was fun and I had time for it.
3. Weekly Playgroups
I love that I took him to Gymboree classes and playgroups weekly. These activities were less about him and more about me, to be totally honest. They gave me a reason to get dressed and get out of the house regularly, and they introduced me to some incredible women I am still friends with to this day. Regular commitments like this became harder to stick to with each baby after him, but I had a solid base of local mom friends by then, and I knew all the words to the Gymboree bubble song.
4. Incredible Birthday Parties
I love that I planned him some really incredible birthday parties. We’ve moved away from doing elaborate, themed parties every year, but it was a fun creative outlet for me. I didn’t plan them because I felt like I had to impress anyone. I did it because I enjoyed it. And I’m actually looking forward to doing more for my littles when we get off the road and settled into a community (sans hand-sewn favors). My oldest, though, is pretty much past this stage, and I’m glad I relished it while I could.
5. World Revolved Around My First Baby
I love that our world revolved around him for a couple years. That one-baby life was pretty special, and while I do lament that I wish I had ignored him more, I don’t regret the hours and days he was our only entertainment. I don’t regret the nights we kept him up a little late or the mornings we let him sleep in bed with us. We were much stricter about routines with him than with the other 3 kids. I think that mostly had to do with us needing to feel in control of this wild and new thing called parenthood. I’m most fond of the memories of when we let those routines fall away for a bit.
BE EXTRA if you want, first-time parents! There is no shame in cherishing this new role and going all out IF YOU WANT TO.
Tell me what brought you joy when you had only one baby that you refuse to feel shame about.
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17 comments
Gosh, I love this. It’s so true…. it’s completely okay to have a different experience parenting first kids from second kids, etc. Seasons change, and resources change, and peripheral priorities change. I mean, the basics of loving your kids and helping them be healthy and happy and safe and kind are always there, but the diapers, food, and celebration options are all bonus. You can be extra or basic or in between, and it’s all. fine. Thanks for the reminder, from a mom who bought disposable diapers and premade pouches for the younger brother of the cloth-diapered, homemade puree-fed firstborn.
It is crazy how different things usually are between the first baby and the others. I have three kids and it seems like I did all of this and more with my first daughter! However, it just got harder to do as the other two came along.
This is awesome- I liked seeing what someone else loved about doing with/for their child, as I’m just starting out with my first kid so I’m trying to determine what to do! ?
Glad you liked it, Heidi!
I didn’t know about Gymboree classes. I will have to start looking into those for my toddlers. Sounds like a great idea. We depend on the weekly library toddler time for our chances to introduce our child Emma to other kids.
Library time is incredible, too!
They just grow up too fast! I enjoyed this post!
I tried to do the same things I did with my first baby with all eight.
Love this post. I want to use more cloth diapers, too. And making baby food is now my hobby.
I really enjoy that article 🙂 You are an angel mom <3
One of the things that I did for my little one, was to use only toxin-free products for him. And after doing my research I came across the moms co. and their products were oh so good! Definitely worth repurchasing! 😀
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The stories of first-born children are great, not to be ashamed of. Your article is interesting
Greate article. Keep posting such kind of information on your blog. Charlot Renault Kriste
Great information, especially about the cloth diapers. Thank you for sharing.
Great information, especially about the cloth diapers. Cloth diapers are way better than regular ones.
Really helpful information !! I also have a 3 years old baby boy. I could not tried all of these but tried some of the things from this. I would also like to share this with my fb community of 22k moms and pregnant women. Thank you for this.