I know I’ve written about this before- how my advice to first time parents is simply “IGNORE THEM MORE.” It’s insane when I think about the kind of guilt I let myself feel when I wasn’t orchestrating every moment of my first born’s early years of life.
Society told me, “You are a stay at home mom, so your job is to enrich your child’s life during all waking hours. Be sure he’s eating the best, learning the most, and never bored.”
Society is such a lying, destructive asshole to new parents.
My first born is a lovely kid, intelligent, funny. He also lives to be entertained and have things done for him because why wouldn’t he? That’s all he knew.
It’s a much more complex issue than just that, of course. I’m sure my postpartum anxiety comes into play here. I paint this picture as a contrast for you, though.
Lowell, 3rd baby, 3 years old, and he makes his own peanut butter & jelly sandwiches. Literally, from gathering all the stuff from the pantry and refrigerator, to actually putting the thing together. HE DOES IT ALL HIMSELF.
We did not teach him this. I can only guess this is a life skill he picked up after we ignored him to the point of him figuring it out on his own.
Listen, we feed the kid… at appropriate meal and snack times, but not always when he wants.
*Worth mentioning- the first kid would have been making a PB&J with all organic ingredients, and I would have screamed if I found him with a butter knife.
But do you see the MAGIC that comes from ignoring them???
TEAM IGNORE THE CHILDREN (within appropriate and legal boundaries, of course)
So I wound up getting this video because I had my camera on me and was headed to photograph this book- Remarkably Average Parenting by my friend Ilana Wiles – when I turned the corner to find him doing this. It was 100% NOT STAGED. I was just going to take the picture of the book in the natural light on top of the dining room table (after I opened those blinds). Perfect timing, right? That’s some remarkably average parenting right there, for sure.
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[…] this mean I ignore them? Not necessarily (though I am Team Ignore The Children, for sure). I’m just not going to let myself feel guilty for not being totally available to […]
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