BEHOLD! The faces of LoLo.
It’s a survival thing. You can’t possibly want to extinguish your own offspring after they climb into the pantry for the 42nd time in 2 hours when they are this adorable.
Lowell is perhaps SO adorable (I mean, yes, I’m biased, but that surprise face is everything) because he is SUCH AN ASS KICKING.
I can. NOT. not watch him every single minute. It could mean disaster. Sure, he could just sweetly play with his cars and “beeg chucks!” on the couch for an hour OR HE COULD ALSO TRY TO QUIETLY CLIMB IN THE OVEN.
And because I just NEVER know with him, he must be constantly supervised.
Bottom right picture of that collage up above is of Lowell at Kendall’s first football practice on Tuesday. I had the beginnings of a cold, because of course since it was also the 2nd day of school and the first week I’d get any time to work. Bitterness aside, I cheerfully took Kendall to his practice with Lowell in tow and a bag full of snacks.
And then I discovered it was a 2 hour practice because we live in Texas, and truly I should know this much by now. I’m a fool for thinking it would be one hour and we would be home in time for dinner and bedtime. That is only the plan for you yankee sissies who do not care enough about training your 7 year olds to play football.
(If this post makes it to Kendall’s football coach, please know I don’t hold this against you. I’m drunk on cold meds right now and the sarcasm is strong. I feel this disclaimer is needed because there’s been a shocking increase in community members who now know I have a blog and are reading it, but I don’t know if they realize I’m a genuine smart ass, and I swear I try not to talk this way in front of my children. That is why I have a blog. In theory.)
So instead, I spent TWO HOURS… wait, that’s a lie, we were late… ok, ONE AND A HALF HOURS chasing Lowell and preventing him from running onto the field to snatch footballs, flags, soccer goals, cones, and random bottles of water he intended on infesting with his trail of snot.
And this whole week I’ve been fighting this cold, while trying to keep him alive. Literally while trying to keep him from running in front of cars and jumping off of kitchen counters while I ran a fever and did that sweat, shiver cycle that should really only be experiences while in bed.
Naturally, this was a week Scott was traveling for business.
But back to toddlers.
I can’t talk long because mine is awake and I must go retrieve him and the follow him around until he blesses me with a nap. In the meantime, know I’ll be repeating nonsense like this.
I try to document it on my @ThingsIActuallySay Instagram account. When I get time. Like, the 15 seconds between setting him down in the playroom and retrieving him from the top of the bookshelf.
It’s not going so well. But he’s cute, so there’s that.
Please, comfort me with all the ways your toddler is also kicking your ass.