I think this post might come off like I’m drunk, but really I’m just drowning in my own snot all up in my head. I have a sinus infection from hell.
I mean, that’s just me self diagnosing. We’ll see what the doc says in a few hours. But basically my brain feels like a very ripe zit right now. Like, you could probably pop my face, and a gallon of mucus would spew from between my eyes.
Anyway, oh is it lunchtime? I’m so sorry.
I’ve been sick for at least a month now. I got a cold or something and it just never went away. It turned into a sore throat, and now this. Flying the last two weekends was brutal. Like, I was looking at the flight attendants as they passed with a face that was trying to say, “NO BUT REALLY AM I DYING?” but none of them seemed concerned. I guess the feeling that an actual knife is stabbing your between the eyes is a normal one in the air-business.
Oh yes, I’ll take the can of cold soda, please, so I can PRESS IT TO MY FOREHEAD AND CRY. Nothing to see here. Carry on.
The being sick and tired thing all the time is getting really old. I’m forever missing deadlines and play dates and crap, and I’m sure people are like, “We know. We know. You are ‘busy’ and you are ‘sick’ and have a baby.” I get annoyed at myself every time I start an email with, “So sorry for the delay!” That’s basically how every email starts now.
The good news is I’m actually answering emails now, which speaks to my feeling less and less like it’s the end of the world every day. Let’s face it, when you spend your days worrying about all the cancers and car accidents that will kill you, it’s hard to make emails a priority. So yay Lexapro! (And fuck you, postpartum anxiety.)
I’m in a very weird, exciting place with this blog, though. This has been and, I’m confident, will continue to be a great year for this space. I’m mid re-design, and have a lot of plans.
The plans and the strategies seem to be getting in the way of my need to put words to keyboard somedays, though, even when I don’t have a pretty picture to go with it. Truly, there are many times I have something to say (you know, about my brain being a snot-filled zit), and I just don’t because I don’t have a picture, or I don’t have some witty way to present it.
And that’s crap, and not what I want this space to be. I want this space to be a reflection of me in that one day I can be crafting and appear to have my shit together, and the next day I’m rambling about inappropriate things in the parking lot of a church.
So let’s add that to the “plan,” Jill. Let’s add, “ramble more with no regard for strategy and Pinterest.” Okay, done.
There is no real takeaway here. I just had some time while Lowell naps, and I have emails to return and campaigns to pitch and strategies to tweak, but I just wanted to say hi and talk to you on my lunch break. So hi. I’m sorry for the zit imagery.