Remember all those problems we had before we had kids?
Totally inspired by the First World Problems meme
What were some of your #PreKidProblems?
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Pre-Kid Problems
Available now: Amazon | Barnes & Noble
Available now: Amazon | Barnes & Noble
56 Comments
Oh man. Milk and eggs used to always expire around here prekids!
Yesterday I muttered to myself how annoying it was that I had so much food in my fridge that I had to keep taking things out and moving them around to get to the milks. Total first world problem.
Hahahaha! I used to listen to my iPod when I went grocery shopping to fill the silence. Now – yeah, not so much.
My Pre-kid problem:
My dinner was so hot that I burnt my mouth.
TOTALLY a pre-kid problem.
Haha!! Love these. Especially the one about missing brunch. Oh, my simple pre-kid life. Haha!
There’s nothing good on TV on Saturday afternoons. I guess I’ll just nap.
We haven’t had sex in two days, guess I better buy her some flowers.
cannot like enough.
YES YES YES. Especially all the movies!!
We have no plans for Saturday night. I guess we’ll just HAVE to head to the closest bar & see if any good bands are playing.
you are magnificently funny and unwaveringly honest. i love this list.
My pre-kid problem…
Ugghh! I only have enough time to watch 5 episodes of The Sopranos tonight.
Nothing planned for an afternoon, which book will I read?
That movies one is so my husband and I. And now we’ve seen ONE movie in theaters in the past two years.
I call bullshit on the boobs thing. Boobs can never be too perky, at least not real ones.
I seriously had shirts that just didn’t look right because my boobs were too big and perky, at least for an office setting. I swear, I could never buy tops at Banana Republic before I had kids.
Ahh I see. Mine were small and perky. As was the rest of my body. *sobs*
::pours a 40 out for our old bodies:: – moment of silence-
I can honestly say that these weren’t really problems for me before. I guess it just depends on your normal lifestyle.
I’m still pre-kid and these are cracking me up. Especially the milk one. Lol
I was thinking brunch and then you did it. Love it.
I especially love how (in someone else’s hands) this could have EASILY gone bad and self-righteous the way parents can – like nothing that isn’t kid-centric is important. I can always count on you to stay far away from that.
Thank you for noticing that, Lisa. I made a conscious effort to not go into that territory. These are all legitimately things that bothered me before I had kids. I mean, Scott and I would be up at, like, 10:30 on a Saturday morning and be all, “So? I guess we’ll go to the mall… again? I mean, I have no idea what else we’re going to do this weekend.” This is me making fun of the old me.
I completely agree with Lisa’s comment. And these are just awesome!
yup that about sums it up!
“So much time on my hands, I need a new hobby, but what?”
“What will I do with this extra money I have?'”.
The local movie theater has shows for $4 at 10am….I can’t drag myself out of bed that early on a Saturday.
Ugh I really don’t like this nail polish color. I guess I’ll have to take it off and paint them a different color.
I am so sick of going to the gym every day! I think I’ll take a nice long jog outside today.
🙂
Oh no, ran out of books to read, guess I will have to go buy another!
Gah! There are so many unused rooms in this house. Seems so wasteful to have two guest bedrooms… I’m sick of having to dust them once a month. 🙂 (& now guest are forced to sleep on a pull out sofa- lol)
lol, hell yeah!
It’s too lonely in the bathroom. Someone please come with me.
I would get bored showering and whatnot. I loved when my husband would sit in the bathroom with me while I showered. And before husband, it was my best friend who came with me.
These are brilliant. Truly.
Signed,
Girl With The #PreKidProblems, except for brunch. Allergies mean I skip brunch. 🙂
Ha ha ha! I can totally relate to the shopping one.
Love every one of these. Especially the jeans 🙂
LOLOLOL! Excellence. Especially the “i’ve already seen all the good movies that are out right now.”
Maybe also “I feel like I don’t spend enough time around the house”
“I’ve already read this book.. Book club wants to read it. CAN’T HANDLE THE TWO TIMES IN A ROW.”
“Want to get a pet. Freaked out by poop clean up.”
“The car last clean just 3 weeks this time.”
“Do I have my manicure done or do I have lunch first?”
“It’s my friend’s kid’s b-party, where is the toy store and what should I buy?”
Funny! There is nothing on TV tonight. I guess I will read a book! 🙂 🙂
I’ll take these any day over a snot-nosed little brat.
Surprised no one mentioned this:
This car ride is so long and boring!
These are great!
“So many conflicts on my social calendar. Do I *really* feel like going to three parties in one night? I’m so exhausted!”
“We’re out of wine?!” oh wait, that one’s the same pre-kid as post kid.
This is awesome. Here’s my contribution:
“I have so many nice clothes that I have to go the dry cleaners weekly.”
So I’m still pregnant with #1, but it’s setting in early. I’m not looking forward to the droopy boobage and saggy belly people always seem to face after, haha. 🙁 I am just enjoying having awesome boobs while they last. It’s new to me. 😀
Mine:
“I have 3 short sexy club dresses/skirts and I can’t decide which one to wear out tonight. :(”
“I don’t know if I want to drink rum & coke or tequila shots.”
“I can’t decide if I want a caramel macchiato or a mocha frappucino.”
“My apartment is just too clean, I feel like no one lives here.”
You can probably tell, I pretty much went directly from college to baby… lol.
Yet every single one of these ‘problems’ are given up willingly.
Made bed, lie in.
You’ve got it in one. Couldn’t have put it better.
That’s a wise answer to a tricky question
Me dull. You smart. That’s just what I needed.
Wow! That’s a really neat answer!
You’ve got to be kidding me-it’s so transparently clear now!
Wow, that’s a really clever way of thinking about it!
Thanks for contributing. It’s helped me understand the issues.
That’s way the bestest answer so far!
Now I feel stupid. That’s cleared it up for me
Touchdown! That’s a really cool way of putting it!
ive done weightlifting since i was 14 even before i knew i was gay does this make me a stereotype? and furthermore do you think someone would still want to have sex with me even though i have anal warts?
Also, noticed the bright green cable that is the NBN creeping in the direction of my place. Hooray! Totally over slow and expensive wifi from mega-corp-international and will look forward to signing up with an Adelaide based ISP.
Words cannot describe how much I love this video, this makes me laugh every time I watch it. Somewhere in the depths of the Lerner basement, there is a video of me around my 4th or 5th birthday where I am literally shoving chocolate birthday cake into my mouth with my fist (and getting my entire face while I’m at it). I looked like I got into a fight with a swamp…and lost. Great minds think (eat) alike.
Scientists seek the truth.Politicians BEND science to fit their pre-conceived ideas – and to support their pre-conceived agendas – regardless of the truth.And politicians who masquerade as scientists – or scientists who dabble in politics – confuse the issue.