Inappropriate Elf Contest, Starring Inappropriate Elf

He’s baaaaAAAAckk! After the smashing success of the first 5 Highly Inappropriate and Traumatizing Elf On The Shelf Ideas post, I’m back with 5 more.

But WAIT, there’s MORE! Be sure to read all about how your inappropriate elf can help you win an iPad2 after these pictures.

5 More Highly Inappropriate and Traumatizing Elf On The Shelf Ideas

Hoarder Elf

You awake to find him in a corner littered with piles of magazines, dirty dishes, nick-nacks, animal feces, and a flat-cat. You think you see his bed under that large mound of laundry.

Arsonist Elf

He’s lighting your toys on fire. The Christmas tree is probably next.

Peeping Tom Elf


He’s in your bushes. Watchin’ the babies.

Psycho Elf

He surprises you in the shower.

Hump Your Leg Elf

He’s as excited as a horny toy-poodle about Christmas! You find him humping your dad’s leg.

Now it’s YOUR turn.

Go HERE to read the details and rules. 

Yes, VERY IMPORTANT, there are rules. So make sure you read them.

Voting has started! That doesn’t mean you can’t still link up, though. You can link up all the way up to the close of voting at midnight on December 20th. Keep the entries coming!

Once voting closes, the top 3 voted through by you and 7 others chosen by me and maybe a friend or 2, will go on to our guest panel of AH-MAZE-ING judges.

Shutterfly Photo Books 300x250


The Bloggess– Uhm, yes, you are not hallucinating. It’s not too late to come up with entries that incorporate dead animals and giant metal chickens!

The Redneck Mommy– Because this contest is officially the coolest thing to ever happen to me in the blogging world, and not only did The Bloggess say yes, but so did The Redneck Mommy… I. Die.

How To Be A Dad– You know, crazy famous, hilarious dads? You and 71,800 something others may be familiar with them on the Twitter.

The Next Martha– Twitter superstar, Halloween goddess, Target Champ, one of the funniest people I’ve ever built something with.

Harpers Happenings- One of my internet besties, Mandy, who also happens to be so funny she makes me pee my pants. She also produces THE. CUTEST. spawn. I’ve urged her to contact Mattel about licensing a Harper doll. CHAPSTICK! (N0 really, you have to watch that.)

Parenting- Illustrated With Crappy Pictures– She draws pictures of my life. I think she watches me. I forgive her because she is a comedic genius.

Rachel Devine– Representing the professional photography aspect here. She’s in this because 1. I love her, and am inspired by her and 2. she has an eye for amazing pictures. And this IS a photo contest, so…

Jason Lynes– Passionfruit Ads founder with a kick-ass sense of humor and the passion to change how you sell and manage ads on your blog. Also a graphic design super star.

The Baby Guy NYC– I just got Jamie’s Christmas Card. He is TOTALLY up for this challenge. I’m just going to leave it at that.

Inspired to enter now??? Use the linky tools below to link up. Want to vote? Just click “like” under the picture you want to vote for. You can vote for as many entries you like, once a day.

Already entered? Here’s a handy button you can put up on your blog to drum up votes. Or if you’re the Photoshop-toting type, here’s a PSD so you can insert your own inappropriate elf into the badge.

Link it back to:


The Land of Nod, design for kids and people that used to be kids

50 Things to Do Before You Deliver: The First Time Moms Pregnancy Guide
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  3. Okay, so I don’t have an elf and had NO plans of getting one. But an iPad? I can certainly get on board with that. And surely my very crazy mind can think of something good 😉

  4. Oh Jill, this is genius! I cant stop laughing at all the entries, the “good bye cruel world” is so funny! I need to make an elf and enter this contest! Looking forward to more laughs ans snorting as Gina put it!

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  7. Can’t wait! Going to buy an elf today just for this (my kid is still too young to get the whole elf thing). I also really appreciate that your system for selecting the Top 10 is a combination of both judging and votes.

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  10. Pingback: Vote for Lucy’s Shelf Elf!

        • In the text box, highlight where you have pasted the link. Then click on the chain (to the right of the picture of the tree). That should allow you to paste the URL into the “Link URL” box. Click ok, and then try the linky part again.

        • I clicked on the link you have in your post, and it brings you straight to the right page and post. Maybe try doing the linky tool again?

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  14. these are all so awesome (except mine, which is lame, but it seemed like a good idea to enter last night at midnight while suffering from insomnia.)

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  17. Step One cut a hole in the box. I literally shot stuff out of my nose. (I’d like to say it was wine, but I have a cold, so it was much, much worse.) I’m still giggling. The Dexter montage is genius too.

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  21. These elves are awesome!! I definitely need to join this bandwagon next year. 🙂 Also, I love your attempt to lay down some rules…and yet the very first photo is a suicidal elf. Hahaha!

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  33. Talk about perfect timing! We just bought one of these for our kids yesterday. I wonder what hilarity I can come up with?

    LOVE that leg-humping elf! I laughed almost to the point of hyperventilating. Can’t wait to see more entries! 😀

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  39. I just read that only one photo can be used per blog. I created a tumblr specifically for this contest, and obviously don’t know WHAT I’m doing! Please delete one of my entries so that I am not a rule-breaker like my elf! My entries are #48 and #93 (and #94 duplicate). Thanks so much!

    If you’s like to see some “not so inappropriate” elf photos – check out my Elf on the Shelf board on Pinterest – Cassandra Johnson – (The profile photo with 3 finger people)

  40. I thought we were only allowed to vote once per day per computer, but some folks on facebook are telling me they’re able to vote multiple times from their computers each day. What is the actual rule there? Don’t want to break any…

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  46. I wish I could enter my Elf into the contest. He has been having his own adventures for the past few weeks. I have been posting his adventures to my facebook page. Some really funny photos here. Keep up the good work and creativity.

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  48. So glad I came across this…what a great contest! Finally, a good laugh involving ridiculously fun people. Wish I had an elf, but I’m going to be immensely entertained by these entries.
    Happy Christmas to me…Thanks!

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  50. OK so obviously I didn’t read the rules at all!! But c’mon how can you not enjoy a night of sex, drugs, and alcohol! Is there any way you can delete the first two entries I put up? I am not Blog Friendly!

    • Hey Dena! I think I accidentally deleted all of your entries?? Not sure. I deleted anything that was elf porn 😉 You can re-upload some pg-13 pics if you’d like.

  51. Argggg!!! I actually managed to take a picture, transfer it to the computer and set up a tumblr account all with my techie husband being away! But the stupid thing won’t let me set up my photo, it keeps saying I don’t have a backlink set up (even though I read through the comments above, tried a billion times, and if I click on the photo it totally links to this page). Help please!

    My blog is


      • I really don’t get it … tried that and is still not working. I think Baby Jesus does not approve of my entry! 😉 Can you try looking and seeing if you can see my website or what I am doing wrong??

        • Hang on… headed that way. So sorry for the confusion! If I don’t get it worked out tonight, try again tomorrow and we’ll contact the guy who runs this linky tools program.

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  55. I plan on selling my iPad to provide food for thousands of orphans overseas, who are really counting on me this Christmas. Just think about that every time you vote for an elf that is not #2.

    Some of you should be ashamed of yourselves.

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  72. Rebecca Gonyea on

    I am having some issues posting our inappropriate elf pic…I don’t have an actual blog yet so I tried via tumblr…can someone assist me? please:(

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