We Have Each Other, It’s Enough, And I Wouldn’t Change A Thing

5 years ago, I imagined we’d escape to a tropical island, or maybe Italy… or Greece, anywhere but the ‘burbs of Dallas for our 5 year anniversary. I dreamed of getting another diamond band to stack on top of my engagement ring and wedding band.

5 years ago, we were DINKs (dual income, no kids) living in an apartment. Now, we’re a single income family of 4, taking on home renovations.

The budget wasn’t there to do anything elaborate for our 5 year anniversary. It wasn’t anything like I imagined it would be 5 years ago.

When I shared our wedding pictures last week, there was a picture of our soda bar. Scott and I never got to drink any of those sodas (Dublin Dr Peppers and Mexican Cokes) or any of their flavorings (cherries, vanilla, limes, peanuts), and we’ve always talked about what a shame that was. It was one of our favorite parts of the celebration, but we just didn’t have time to enjoy it.

So I recreated it.

And then we, along with Kendall, toasted to 5 years…

We celebrated with a trip to the park as a family. Leyna went down a tiny slide by herself for the first time. We ate bagels at Panera. We took the extra long way home, window shopping for new houses… ones that don’t needΒ anyΒ renovations. We listened to kids screaming and whining most the day. We took them with us to dinner at Outback Steakhouse, where Kendall built houses out of the coasters and Leyna threw more food on the floor than any of us had left on our plate by the end of the night.

The Hallmark card I gave Scott read:

Someday, many years from now, we’ll look back on this crazy time in our life together and wonder how we did it all… and then, those ordinary, everyday moments that we often take for granted will shimmer like stars as we recount them… I’ll sit close beside you, you’ll take my hand in yours. We’ll look at each other and say: “I’d do it all again… and I wouldn’t change a thing.”

And then I wrote on the inside, “I’m sorry this card is so sappy! But it’s SO true!” because I know he much prefers the Shoebox cards for their humor.

But, I couldn’t help but feel that card so perfectly summed up this time in our lives.

We’ll have time for kid-free vacations to exotic locations eventually. Years from now, we won’t have to invest so much money in our kids, we won’t still be paying hospital bills from the birth of a new baby. One day, we’ll have all the free time in the world, we’ll have silence. But, for now, we have chaos and noise; we have sticky baby fingers and a daredevil toddler; we have a home and our health; we have each other, it’s enough, and I wouldn’t change a thing.

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  1. So true! My mother in law always talks about how sad it is when parents think the only way they can have fun and relax is without their kids. Why can’t spending time WITH our kids be fun? It’s for such a short time. They are taking us AND our kids on vacation in January. I’ve also been super annoyed when people who are about to have kids are preparing for their lives to be over. Life isn’t over, it’s just different. And it’s still good, if not better! And there’s still lots of life to live after they’re grown and gone, so finish your degree, travel the world and do whatever then! πŸ™‚ That’s just my opinion on the subject. πŸ™‚

    • I did enjoy having them around to celebrate, and we don’t feel like our “life” is over at all. That said, I would totally take someone up on some babysitting for a kid-free date night or vacation πŸ˜‰

      • Evelyn T. Bowers on

        12, 1, 2011 Take time each day

        for just five minutes on your

        blog..I burned my husbands

        letter’s because my baby sister

        read them..they were just to

        personal…now 38 years later he

        is dying of cancer..I wish i had

        them back..the Miltary used to

        play War games on our

        anniversary. So we only got to

        spend 5 of the first 20 together.
        While we were in the Military we

        traveld all the time and the next

        20 we neverd seemed to travel

        at all..I thought when he retired

        we would go places again. But

        the only place we go to is chemo

        every three weeks..Every year

        before birthday’s we would get

        out the childrens baby books and

        stick more pictures in and show

        them how they had grown. ..Now

        we are digitizing all the paper

        pictures. I am keeping an

        computer diary named ducktape

        …where I can put all my feeling’s

        I am not allowed to share on

        facebook…everyday I relive the

        past, pray for out future and

        thank God for the time the

        childen and grandchildren have

        with him…count each day a

        blessing for the small little things

        are more importent ..than being

        who is right. make a kiss and a

        hug a daily ritual… make love

        central to a marriage..oh and

        keep the cards in a memory box..

        I found mine at Hallmark.

  2. My anniversary is next week and I feel/felt the same way as you. I love the card, I love the sentiment. And dang it, you made me tear up a bit!

  3. I think I gave my husband the same card!! We just celebrated 4 years in September πŸ™‚ So great you were able to make the most of the moments…and you’re right…someday you will look back on this anniversary and smile πŸ™‚

  4. This is exactly where we are in our lives too – home renovations and all. It’s glorious in a special kind of way that the younger versions of ourselves wouldn’t understand. Happy Anniversary!

  5. Wait a minute – this just me reminded me I wanted another band of diamonds for out ten year anniversary and I didn’t get one! Hmmm…eleven years is coming up, guess my *hints* will be less subtle this year.

    But enough about me, this was a great post and made me smile and maybe tear up a bit too. πŸ™‚

  6. Dammit. That makes me want to cry.

    And also, i have those same dreams of another band for around my engagement ring for our five year (which is in two years). Something tells me I will be spending that money on new carpet or furniture or clothes for two growing kids instead.

  7. Sounds like a perfect anniversary! πŸ™‚ Our five year was pretty low key as well. But our ten year anniversary rocked. Paris baby. I know I don’t have to tell you how fast time goes. You and your husband will be on some fabulous solo-trips before you know it. And you’ll miss the kids like crazy.

  8. Oury 5 year anniversary was in July, and we also had our kids with us….but I wouldn’t change it either. We even went to Quaker Steak with them and I got a red rose in my daqueri :-).

  9. Dan and I went out on Friday night without Joshua for only maybe the 5th or 6th time since he’s been born and it felt weird. Almost incomplete somehow. It’s crazy and hectic and he can be a complete monster sometimes, but it just doesn’t feel right without him.

    Happy 5 years, Jill and Scott. Here’s to many more!

  10. Yes! That is exactly how me and my hubby feel too. It is also why I we decided to start our family on the younger side- because when that silence, and more income is around- you’re still “spry” and “young” and can jet off on more exotic anniversary trips.

  11. I think that sounds like an awesome celebration!! And peanuts in Coke? I’ve never even heard of that. It must be tasty, though, if you guys all drank it with them floating around. Fun!

  12. Pingback: I feel normal again. | CrunchyVTMommy

  13. stop.making.me.cry.

    Yes, it’s sappy. But it’s so true, Jill. So true. These moments are the best of our lives. Some days we want to forget them but when we’re old and wrinkly we won’t have forgotten. If that makes sense at all πŸ™‚

  14. Great post and it’s so true. We are lucky and have family very close and who are willing to take Jack for a night or two so Jeremy and I can get away if we want. But know what we do the entire time we are enjoying a kid free night? We talk about Jack all night and then we end up going to bed early.

    Also, what’s up with the nuts in the coke? I’ve never seen that before. Is it best to do with bottled Coke?

  15. I was desperately trying to look for this quote again after falling in love with it while rummaging through the Hallmark aisle at CVS. Even Hallmark’s online site doesn’t have this wonderful card. Thanks for posting it:)

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