The Love of a Practical Man

I can count on one hand the number of times he’s bought me flowers, and one of those times he didn’t really buy them as much as he took them from the centerpieces at the end of a wedding he helped his dad cater.

It’s bothered me in the past. Why WHY can he never just buy me flowers?

It’s more of a symbol for other things, I think. He’s not one to really do anything impractical, it seems. He doesn’t like to throw money at things that don’t have a tangible purpose. He just doesn’t get it. Sometimes a girl just wants a stupid, pointless (in his mind), show of love that’s going to die, like a bouquet of flowers.

Our very first Valentines Day together, 10 years ago, he took my Jeep to get it’s oil changed and headlight replaced for me. At the time, I found it incredibly endearing and creative. But as the years passed, and I continued to get such practical gifts, I’m not going to lie, there were times I was annoyed that he wasn’t more thoughtful, less practical, more frivolous.

I’ve come to love him more and more for this side, though. Our many years together have taught me that this man shows his love by all the PRACTICAL things he does for me and his children. And I adore him for that. When I’m having a bad day, he doesn’t ever think to surprise me with jewelry. Instead, he pours me a glass of wine, tells me to sit down and cleans the house for me.

He may not be able to shop for me for Christmas without begging me for an itemized list of specific items I’d like, but every Saturday he lets me sleep in while he makes breakfast with and entertains Kendall.

So this year I really wasn’t expecting too much for Valentines Day. I did, after all, get my amazing Canon T2i camera for Christmas, and my 30th birthday is right around the corner. I figured I would get the standard card and candy.

Imagine my surprise when I came out of the room this morning to find on our kitchen island not only the standard card and candy (and Valentines from Kendall, too), but also a pair of pink Converse shoes.

Shoes I stopped to look at briefly over a month ago, and had long since forgot about. Not only did he make a note in his Iphone to go back and get them, but he also checked the shoes in my closet to make sure he got my size right.

“I was so excited when you said you wanted those! You need new shoes. They’re perfect,” he beamed over the phone this morning when I called to thank him.

I absolutely do need new shoes, and I absolutely love that they are pink.

Expensive? Not at all (on clearance at Target).

Practical? For sure.

Thoughtful? SO VERY.

Flowers? Pshaw. So much better.

Happy Valentines Day. I hope you’re enjoying all the ones who love you today, and ALL the ways they show they love you.

Scott and I have been together for 10 years and 14 days (our first date was 1-31-2001).

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  1. Aww yay! I got a Keurig and I LOVE it. I am always complaining about wasting a pot of coffee for one cup or how I’d love to just enjoy a cup of decaf at night and the man listened and delivered.

  2. Love it! My husband doesn’t “get” Valentine’s day either. He wants to, but my practical side probably discourages him from just getting me the sappy card and flowers. I don’t have my hopes up for when I get home today, but maybe I might just get my own version of pink converse shoes…

  3. My hubby is the SAME way….he has gotten a bit better and has certainly surprised me with being spontaneous on occasion, but typically, he tends to be pretty practical too. Although, I will say that this year I specifically asked for two things – to cook me dinner and chocolate and I’m pretty sure that’s what I will get and I will be more than fine with that. He just spent the ENTIRE weekend cleaning and organizing around our house to let me have time to work, so that was a pretty big present for me already. 😉 It’s the little things that mean the most and are truly the ‘biggest gifts’, right???

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  5. i love this post!!
    your husband is soo sweet 🙂
    my husband once sent me a poutine at work when i was pregnant with our first.
    all the others at work thought it was sweet but weird. i fell in love all over because he knew id been craving them, remembered and had one delivered 🙂 in my books its always the thought behind anything that matters!!

  6. Dave ordered me a giant heart-covered can of popcorn from a popcorn shop at the beach that we frequented many times over the course of a week’s vacation this summer. Not really romantic or practical but also perfect. After 10 years and 127 days, this is on the list of top 10 gifts. 🙂

  7. I got a snack pack of oreos. We’ve been oreo-less for a week now and I think he was worried it might get ugly. So it’s actually perfect.

    Happy Valentines!

  8. So cute!!! I love pink and those shoes are freakin adorable!
    Last year I got pink and silver pumas and couldn’t have been happier. This year he bought me the Just Dance 2 for Wii.
    I’ve never been much of a flower person. Besides being allergic to most flowers, I’d love to have fun or practical gifts. Ya know, things I can’t seem to make myself buy like new shoes. 🙂

  9. Love the shoes! And how thoughtful, he definitely showed that he is attentive!

    We celebrated by going to a favorite restaurant on Saturday. There was a little more to our weekend than that, but generally we’ve chosen not to purchase gifts for Valentine’s Day.

    DIG those shoes, though! Wonder if they’re on clearance at my Target… though I really want some high top Chucks…

  10. Oh my god ! Those sneakers, they totally rock! I am green with envy! What a cool, thoughtful gift!

    I love reading your site, you take great pictures and you’re so funny, warm and real.Thank you for sharing your day with us!

  11. Awww, so sweet!

    Start an wish list. You can add items to it from other sites, too. I used it for my kid’s birthday and Christmas and have started one for myself. If you do it throughout the year, you can still be surprised on holidays.

    And I see someone else here has read the Five Love Languages. I loved that book – well, the concept, at least, the book I found pretty repetitive and preachy. It really opened my eyes to how different my husband and I are, and why I can’t just accept his way of showing love. I mean, I can, and I *know* he loves me, but I don’t *feel* it unless I get Words of love. He is learning to be “bilingual” and so am I. I tell him I love him and I thank him for stuff all the time, but now I’m sure to scratch his head or smack his butt when I do it, since Touch is his love language.

    For anyone else, the 5 languages are:

    Words of Affirmation
    Physical Touch
    Acts of Service
    Gifts (not necessarily expensive, but something tangible)
    Quality Time

    Knowing yours and your spouses can really help. Shoot, it even helped me with my dad.

    • I keep meaning to read this book! I think, based on my assumptions, I would be Gifts and my husband would be Acts of Service. I wish I could find a cliffs notes version.

  12. I remind my husband weeks in advance, so I won’t get hurt and he won’t feel bad. Then on Christmas I didn’t think we were even going to do anything. He’s never had a Christmas, Muslim. I’m used to having 90+ people around me on Christmas, but now I can’t because I’m hours away from everyone. So this year he went and bought things he’d remembered weeks ago that I had looked at. We cooked a turkey and had the best day of my life.

    He’s very practical as well. Annoyingly so. I’m practical as well and this works most of the time. But when he surprises me like this I’m utterly amazed and I know I’ve found my heaven.

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