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The StoryToddlers

Toddler mood swings

by Jill March 23, 2010
March 23, 2010

The following is what I can only imagine goes through Kendall’s head every morning. It’s pretty much always the same thing, the same back and forth of emotions, the same rivalry with the dog. This nearly 2 year old little boy seems to have the mood swings of a PMSing 16 year old girl.

::rub eyes, check to make sure all toys and books are still in bed with me, see that I still have room on this mattress for more stuff, crawl out of bed and toddle over to the sock drawer, bring back all the socks I can carry in my chubby arms, climb back in bed and be happy::

Hmmm.. I’m hungry, and I can’t find the cheese I tried to bring to bed with me last night.

“MA! MAAAAAA!!….. DA?…Woof??”

::sit, wait, undo diaper::

I think I hear her coming… yup… there she is! Quick, show her all the socks!

“MA!!”

Oh wait, I’m not ready to get out of bed. I’m still sleepy! NO! Why is she making me get out of bed?!

“NO. Grrrrrrrr. No!”

::flailing limbs, body to jelly::

Must resist clean diaper. If she gets a clean diaper on me, she’ll think she can put clean clothes on me. Do NOT WANT CLOTHES! Oh look, a dog.

“Woof!”

::smile::

Dammit, how did she get that diaper on me! Stupid distracting dog trick.

::turn to jelly again when set on floor, collapse into puddle of screaming::

Why is she asking me what’s wrong? I don’t know! …Β Oh, breakfast. Yes! Bananas!

::stand up, run to kitchen, wait by bananas, lose patience::

“Nanananana! Pease! EEEEEE!”

::watch mom like a hawk, making sure she doesn’t ruin the banana by taking the peel off for me::

Whew. That was close.

::unpeel banana by myself Β because I’m grown up like that, leave peel on the floor, scream at dog when she tries to eat it::

OMG! OMG, what just happened?! OH NO! The banana is broken! I BROKE THE BANANA! This will not DO! How could I do this?

“Uh OH!”

::throw banana on floor, crying::

NO! Why is the dog eating the banana?! That’s MY broken banana! Give it back!

::SCREAMS VERY LOUD::

Why is she not getting me a new banana? What does she mean USE MY WORDS?! Use YOUR words and tell the dog to give me back my broken banana!

::hit mommy::

There, now go get me a new banana…. Wait… what? Where are you taking… to TIMEOUT?? Are you for real?! It’s the dog’s fault!

::sit in stupid boring corner, take off socks, be bored, give dog evil glare, vow to never drop her food from the table again::

Yes, mommy. I’m sorry. Yes, I know. No hitting. Yes, I’ll give you a hug. And look at how cute and sweet I am, don’t ever forget it. Here’s a sweet smile just for you.

::hug mommy, walk over and hug dog, but this doesn’t mean I’ve forgiven::

Oh look! Diego!

“Go Go!”

::run over to TV, eat new banana, drink milk, lay head on doggie::

I love Diego. I love bananas. I love my doggie.

Kendall is nearly 23 months old, and sometimes I wonder if Midol might help.


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28 comments

LooneyJen March 23, 2010 - 2:41 pm

Just found your blog today. You are HILARIOUS! And I also have a 23 month old with mood issues. Thanks for the giggles. πŸ™‚

Reply
LCW March 23, 2010 - 2:43 pm

That was great! Thanks for the laugh.

Reply
Upstatemomof3 March 23, 2010 - 2:43 pm

Ha ha ha!! I am literally cracking up. Mostly because Big Sister was just standing in front of me saying “pebong! Pebong! PEBONG! PEEEEEEBOOOONNNNGGGG!” And then she was icking and flailing and throwing herself around as I very calmly told her that she “can throw a fit all you want but I do not know what you want” and then she abruptly stopped and is now off playing with her “cat-cat” Toddlers are so much fun, aren’t they?

Reply
Brett March 23, 2010 - 2:44 pm

Great post! Made me smile for maybe the first time since I got to work today…

Reply
Rebekah March 23, 2010 - 2:44 pm

This totally made my day! I imagine the same thing going on with my 27 month old only he does use his words, particularly when those words are “No, Mommy I don’t want [insert offending object]!”

Reply
sabrina March 23, 2010 - 2:44 pm

This is just awesome! Almost the same thing that goes on in Drew’s head!!

Reply
Jessica March 23, 2010 - 2:54 pm

LMAO that was so spot on and hilarious. Love.

Reply
Totty March 23, 2010 - 3:00 pm

OMG this is exactly what mornings are like for us too. Thanks for the laugh! πŸ™‚

Reply
Stacey March 23, 2010 - 3:01 pm

Oh My Gosh….this sounds so much like my 15 month old son. Except he doesn’t speak as well and is still in his crib…but this last month I find myself wondering who switched my son with a crazed kid that obviously belongs to someone else! Thanks for this post. At least I can see I better get used to the shannigans…they will be lasting for a while!

Reply
Amanda March 23, 2010 - 3:02 pm

LMAO. This was a perfect description of an average day in my house. Thank you.

Reply
vtjill March 23, 2010 - 3:06 pm

I would swear you’ve been at my house reading this. Love it and glad I’m not the only one stuck in toddler mood swing land.

Reply
Vanessa March 23, 2010 - 3:28 pm

Haha too funny!! I have a lot to look forward to!

Reply
Susan March 23, 2010 - 3:35 pm

You never disappoint, Jill. Thanks for the laugh. It sure seems like when they are this age, they are more like little cavemen than people. What a frustrating world they live in, huh?

Reply
Jenn March 23, 2010 - 8:28 pm

High. Larious.

I can only imagine what goes through their little heads.

And then again, I’m not always sure I want to know.

Reply
Lauren March 23, 2010 - 8:48 pm

You hit the nail on the head!! You are hilarious. This is my morning EVERY.SINGLE.DAY. minus the dog. Thanks for putting words in my son’s mouth.

Reply
Larisa March 23, 2010 - 11:27 pm

God. That just sounds exhausting.

Reply
Shannon Kieta March 24, 2010 - 8:09 am

My house, without the dog!!! Replace the dog with a year and a half year old girl! LOL! This is pretty much EVERYONE’S life these days. Hang in there! Before you know it, he will be off to school!

Reply
Law Momma March 24, 2010 - 10:13 am

Hahahahaha I love it! This made me laugh out loud at my desk. People are staring and I’m okay with it because dear God you are one funny lady. Thanks for sharing!

Reply
Molly in MN March 24, 2010 - 10:42 am

ohhhhhhh I just lol’d at my desk and got some fun looks!! πŸ™‚

Reply
Sarah March 24, 2010 - 11:20 am

Haha, definitely brought a smile and some giggles to my day!! What it must be like to be inside a toddler’s head… I know when I taught preschool I NEVER had a clue what they were thinking.

Reply
Sarah @ BecomingSarah.com March 24, 2010 - 6:08 pm

LOL!!

I could totally picture this entire thing playing out. Haha =)

Reply
Callie March 24, 2010 - 8:29 pm

I just laughed so hard! Kendall’s thought process sounds exactly the way I imagine my son’s thoughts. Loved the part about the banana breaking! Very accurate toddler portrayal, Jill. πŸ™‚

Reply
Fran March 25, 2010 - 5:06 am

So funny! I’d almost forgotten about my daughter, at that age, getting frustrated because we couldn’t understand her language. We can only imagine what’s going through their brains, but you’re probably not too far off. Thanks for the laugh today!

Reply
Jill March 25, 2010 - 2:24 pm

Thanks! So good to know so many of you can relate and that these mood swings aren’t a sign of abnormality.

Reply
Young GrandMa March 27, 2010 - 5:44 pm

We have our 16 month old Grandson ALOT & our days are EVERYTHING you just described except he brings me shoes instead of socks (This kid has ALOT of shoes & slippers)…We just started using “Time Out” and it’s 1 minute in the old rocking chair…After “Time Out” He goes to EVERYONE in the house & gives Hugz & ALWAYS Says Aaaaahhhh as he’s hugging Us …I just found your blog today & look forward to reading the entire thing…Thanks for the giggles !!!

Reply
fetal heart doppler March 28, 2010 - 8:02 am

It is great to come here and be able to laugh at the ‘terrible two’s’. Sometimes when living with your terrible two year old you look at her and think ‘oh my God have I really created such a monster’. It is great to hear that others have these monsters living in their homes as well as me.

Reply
Anna March 29, 2012 - 8:33 pm

I cannot even tell you how much I LOVE THIS POST!!! Yep, I”m late to the party but I feel like this is my every single day and sometimes I can’t take it but I love how you tried to see things from the toddler perspective – and I can’t stop laughing. It’s so true for how they probably feel and see things. Awesome post πŸ™‚

Reply
Tyler January 31, 2014 - 12:52 pm

This is not funny. THIS IS FREAKING HILARIOUS!!! This sounds EXACTLY like our house. I literally had tears rolling down my face as I read this.
In the words of my two year old “more-more…MORE!!!!”

Reply

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