Scott is working from home two days a week now, and I am blown away by his work ethic. He’s really *working*, like, the whole 8 hours. I keep telling him nobody would know if he took an extra long lunch break or a few extra coffee breaks, but he’s all honest and shit… for now. And while I don’t get much from him during the day in the form of help, except the two times that Kendall crapped a muddy river and I screamed and insisted he help me clean up, I am getting a healthy and refreshing dose of respect (not that he really lacked in that department, let’s just say it’s been an eye-opener for him).

This morning, for the first and probably only time, he took on the duty of watching Kendall while trying to work so I could head out to the chiropractor (OOOOOMMMMGGGG amazing, all moms should see chiropractors) so he could continue working on this nerve damage in my shoulder, undoubtedly amplified, if not actually caused by Kendall. I was gone about two hours and called to check in on my way home.

“He’s crazy,” Scott says.

::background noise:: ahhh, babababab,baaaww!! EEEEEEE!!

“What do you mean?” I reply sheepishly.

“He’s crazy, Jill. He …I… I can’t get anything done. He’s just”

“Yeah, I understand. I will be home soon.”

“I don’t think he’s feeling well. He won’t stop whining and crying,” he says in an official tone.

“Uhhhhh… well, that sounds pretty normal,” I say, stifling a laugh.

I get home and am greeted at the door by a pantsless little boy, still in his jammy top, covered in banana slime and snot, beaming from ear to ear. “Momma, mommommoma, momA!” he says. It almost sounds like a genuine, “I’ve missed you, where have you been? I love you!” I scoop him up and think, “Ahhh, so this is what it feels like to be missed, to come home to a little guy who is excited to see you.” I never really experience that since I am around him all. the. time.

I am quickly corrected when I realize what he is really trying to say is, “Oh my God, what the hell? You leave me with dad and he doesn’t even read me any stories or put Sesame Street on for me. He’s just sitting there, trying to WORK, and he won’t give me any more snacks! I want SNACKS! Naaaaaack! Naaaaack!”

I head to the kitchen and reach for a box of cereal, set him up at the table and fill a little bowl for him. Scott wanders in and I ask him how it went. He says …… pause for dramatic effect….. get this…

“You have no idea.”

::blink, raise eyebrows, blink, cold stare::

“Oh, wait… yeah, sorry. Yes you do. Sorry,” he blurts out quickly, bracing himself for the knives I might throw at him.

He follows up with several mentions of how he doesn’t know how I get anything done, to which I remind him that I usually don’t. He says he understands why I had to stop working from home and thank God for that one day a week when Kendall goes to Mother’s Day Out, right?

I think he’s beginning to question the whole work at home thing. Clearly this is not remotely as peaceful as the office and no amount of casual clothes and zero commute is going to change that. Honestly, I wouldn’t blame him if he changed his mind.

Kendall is 15 months and nearly three weeks old

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  1. That.is.awesome. You crack my shiz up. I’m a temporary SAHM, and it’s only been 5 days…I tried to explain how hard it was to H, but you know how that goes… 🙂

  2. My husband works from home at least one day a week and with 3 kids it can get a little crazy. He shuts himself away though and it works out. It’s nice to have him home later in the morning and home earlier in the evenings. I think it was an eye opener for him as well 🙂

  3. I’m a SAHM and when my husband is home on weekends, frantically pulling carpet fuzz out of her mouth, prying her off our electronics, etc., I simply look at him and say, “Welcome to my world. This is what I do allllll daaaay.” Nice little eye-opener for him, I believe.

  4. HA! Yep, I am very familiar with this situation. Actually, my DH doesn’t work from home, but he is home with Hudson usually 2 or 3 days during the week while I am at work and it’s a never-ending story of can’t get anything done and our child is crazy, hyperactive and needs to be put on Ritalin, lol! And like your DH, I am in the opposite shoes of my DH, but have stayed home with our child enough to know that he is not exaggerating or at least not by much most of the time. It is very difficult and you have to be disciplined while flexible at the same time to make things work when even attempting to get “anything done” while also parenting a toddler. I will soon learn even more about this once I leave my full-time job to actually become a WAHM myself, and not only that, as you know, I will be adding a newborn to the mix come December so it should be *very* interesting to say the least, ha!

  5. well.put.

    I love that your husband actually caught on when he started explaining how “you have no idea”

    most of the time, mine finishes his rant before he looks up to find the daggars! muahahaha!!

  6. Great post and good humor too.
    My husband ‘works from home’ and on a daily basis I unintentionally interrupt him to tell him a funny story or about something cute our son did and it drives him mad. It is his own fault as he often works from the kitchen table instead of his private office. The upside is that once in awhile he will ditch work in favor of a coffee outing and a seawall walk with us.

  7. I am so excited. My husband is about to get his own dose of this in October. His work schedule is changing, he’s a police officer, his days off will now be Thurs and Friday I CANNOT wait … ::snicker:: lol

  8. Ahhhahah, you crack me up as always.

    I love it when Jeff refers to my day that I work from home with Jasper as “my day off”. He can call it my day off when he successfully survives an entire day of just him taking care of Jasper. I should say “IF and when” because I have my doubts it will ever actually happen!

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