Love it or hate it, staying at home with Kendall has been the most rewarding full time job I’ve ever had. It’s also been the hardest. Way to start a blog entry with two cliches, I know. But, really, it’s true. I could go on and on about what it’s like for me to be a stay at home mom, but, frankly, I don’t have the time today.
I just had to get it out there that I am still getting over a case of mom envy that started at Kendall’s one year check up 4 days ago. We arrived at the office 10 minutes early and hung out in the waiting room with a 2 year old boy and his mom who obviously left the office early to come to the appointment, or else she got really dressed up to see the pediatrician. She looked so… pretty, so put together, she smelled nothing like curdled milk, her hair was styled and long, she had a perfect pedicure. Her outfit looked like it was straight off the Banana Republic rack and, instead of a diaper bag, she carried the most beautiful leather tote. She seemed happy and refreshed.
I, on the other hand, threw on one of my “mommy” shirts, long and stretchy and very, very washable, and a pair of jeans that appeared to be the least dirty of the bunch. Try as I might these days, I can’t seem to keep my jeans clean, especially when Kendall runs after me and grabs onto my legs with his slimly little graham cracker crusted hands. The shoes were practical and comfortable flip flops, showing off my half ass attempt at an at home pedicure since time and money for the real ones are always on the short side. My hair was in a sloppy ponytail, and I’m pretty sure I smelled like yesterday’s leftovers. I was tired and visibly disheveled.
I wanted to hate her, but she was far too nice. So I just sat there and silently envied her for a minute. Then felt like an ass for secretly wishing that sometimes I would have a reason to go to a business meeting in a new pencil skirt and blouse, get a quick pedicure on my lunch break, get my next big project in before the deadline, brainstorm in the team meeting, then meet up for cocktails and networking.
No real point to this, I guess. Certainly not to judge anyone or make either side feel guilty about their decision to stay at home or work. Just wanted to say that sometimes I wish I was that girl….
Kendall is 1 year and 6 days old