A Friday Night Confession

It’s Friday night and I’m going to bed early. Why? Not because I’m sick. Somehow I’ve managed to stay clear of the nasty cough my husband still has. Not even because I’m all that tired (LOVE the second trimester energy!). I confess that I am going to go lay in bed in hopes of feeling my baby move. It’s okay…I’ll say it for you…LOSER! PREGNANT FREAK!

But really, the last few nights I *thought* I felt something. Just little twinges and flickers here and there. Could be gas…but there was no dutch oven effect to show for it. I kinda really maybe think it was the baby! I can only feel it when I get really still at night though. So I’m off to lay in bed and concentrate on the inner-workings of my body. I’m very excited about my Friday night date with the alien. Excuse me while I go obsess…

13 weeks 4 days

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  1. Please don’t take this as me being mean, but seriously, stop being so self-deprecating when it comes to your pregnancy! No one is coming here unless they want to read about what is happening with you and the baby, so stop assuming that we are going to think you are a “Loser! Pregnant Freak!” because you want to feel your baby.

    It just seems like you are assuming the worst for everything: that we’re going to look down on you for being excited, that just because you had a baby your boobs are suddenly going to be at your knees and your stomach will be permanently inflated. Sure, these things are possible, but they are not definite. I have friends with babies, that while their bodies are different post baby, it’s not in a bad way. I have one friend who is so much happier with her post baby body! So just relax and enjoy the fact that you are creating new life and don’t assume the worst.

    I don’t know why this is all coming out now (maybe its a bit of jealousy because I definitely have the baby rabies)… but I hate when people see the glass half empty. Especially at what should be such an exciting time for you. Don’t let your assumptions (for yourself, or about what others will think) be a cloud over this incredible time in your life.

  2. You have a great point, Meegs, and I can see how I can come off that way at times. I really am quite excited about the baby, and I know I don’t always blog about the warm, gooey feeling I have, but I can talk to anyone about those anytime. I blog here to get down some thoughts that sometimes I feel, as a pregnant woman, you can’t really express too much because everyone always assumes that this should be the happiest time in your life and you should cherish every minute. TRUST ME, I am soooooooo happy! I don’t spend my days complaining to my husband about how my boobs will never be the same, and I’m quite optimistic that I will come out of this with a pretty decent mommy body ; ) It’s just that sometimes I get a little scared or do things that I thought I would never do, and I come here to get it out. I will take your advice to heart, though. This is only a slice of my life, and I guess it would be good if you all knew some of the better things about this pregnancy for me : )

  3. Donkey, I completely understand where you are coming from. Though you are happy to be pregnant, you need a place to vent about the inteesting things going on with your body. Like the huge boobs, embarassing amount of flatulence, or paralyzing headaches. Though it’s all worth it–You’re pregnant!!–it’s still a part of the pregnancy you need to explore. I think it’s easier to do it annonymously, rather than to your husband, mother, or best friend, because you can really let it all out and not really care who takes offence. I for one, love your blog. I’m actually stalking you from the nest. So keep it coming! ~Ashley(0616)

  4. Donkey, I have to say I disagree with the above poster. I love your writing. I think the things you write about are real and not sugar coated and always hilarious. I don’t think it ever comes across as not being excited to be pregnant. I say keep it up, a blog is something you can use to just write how you are feeling at the time. There would be no point if everything you wrote was all sunshine and rainbows! That isn’t real! I know you are so incredibly excited about this bebe, keep up the good blogging. You are HILARIOUS!

  5. Damn, I just typed up a whole reply and then my browser ate it. Grrr.

    Anyway to sum up what I had written… Bunnies, I don’t expect her to be all sunshine and rainbows. Donkey, I also appreciate that you write what is real. I just wanted to express that the self-deprecation part wasn’t necessary, that you aren’t a loser for wanting to feel your baby and you shouldn’t even think that. Don’t change your writing style because of what I said, as a blogger I understand having that place to vent. I do it to. I just wanted to express the other side of what you were writing and hope that you did see that too even if you didn’t express it here. I’m glad that you do!!


  6. Oh, darling, you are a pregnant freak no doubt about it. But that’s why we love you. You are so in touch with your inner neurotic. 🙂

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