“I am so lucky to have you. We are so happy you’re here!”

We Didn't Know We Were Missing Him Until He Was Here | Babyrabies.com

“Do you like us as much as we like you? I hope so.”

We Didn't Know We Were Missing Him Until He Was Here | Babyrabies.com

“You are the best surprise.”

We Didn't Know We Were Missing Him Until He Was Here | Babyrabies.com

“Thank you for surprising us!”

We Didn't Know We Were Missing Him Until He Was Here | Babyrabies.com

“I never knew you were missing until you were here.”

Those are all actual conversations I have with Wallace every day now. And yes, a conversation. He replies with coos and smiles and infectious giggles.

I found out about a year ago that I was pregnant. It was a HUGE surprise in the way that people will tell you, “We don’t know how this happened!” and you think, “But, of course, you know how this happened!” But seriously, they really don’t know. I still really don’t know.

And, honestly, I wasn’t happy about it. I spent a good part of the first half of that pregnancy pretty mad about it. I had plans for 2016, and they did not include gestating. I had plans for 2017, and they did not include breastfeeding and fighting off debilitating postpartum anxiety.

But he came anyway. He surprised us anyway. He made me white knuckle my way through last year so that I could re-discover how strong I am. He brought us joy and has cleared the fog. He put a lot of priorities in sharp focus.

Clarity.

There is nothing hazy or wishy-washy about his smile or his joyous presence. We didn’t know we were missing him until he was here.

We are so glad he’s here.

And in case you’re wondering, he’s 4 months old, 19 lbs, and 27 inches. I’ve spent about 70% of 2017 breastfeeding so far.

3 thoughts on “We Didn’t Know We Were Missing Him Until He Was Here”

  1. Our Sarah was just the same..plp wouldnt belive how surprised i was…she is our first. we had soo many plans for this year: wedding, honeymoon, graduating from my residency program. Of course we wanted kids but not in a near future, and here she is and we are crazy about her. feeling so blessed to have her. Drooling with every smile and every giggle..will have a 3 plp honeymoon, an extra guess at the wedding and we couldnt be happier. She is 3 months old, 24 inches and 13 pounds of absolut cuteness

  2. This is so great to hear and gives me so much hope. I am pregnant with twins and REALLY struggling with it. I knew I wanted a second baby (my son is 2.5) but didn’t want 2 more and have so much anxiety about how I’m going to make it work and how will I EVER get out of the house again. Reading this and knowing it’s ok to not be so excited all the time about your pregnancy is so comforting. I look forward to posting in the future about how crazy I was and how great the twins and Hudson all are. Thank you!! Also, Wallace is so stinking cute I can’t stand it. 🙂

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