1. Why do the bananas break? WHY?!
2. How to sit on mom’s lap and yet also play with a toy on the other side of the room. At the same time. Why isn’t this possible? It should be possible!
3. How to be sick. Why is my head spinny and what is this coming out of my nose? It is making it very hard to climb onto the table. I should run faster and then throw some toys. And then maybe I’ll scream at mom because she should be fixing this. WHY DO I WANT TO LAY DOWN RIGHT NOW, MAKE IT STOP.
4. No? No this? No don’t do this? This? I don’t understand. You don’t want me to do this?? No?
5. The concept of size and age because why am I not big enough to play swords with the other kids?
6. How coordination and aim work.
7. Anything in moderation.
8. Why mom can’t contort her Gumby arms while driving down the highway to get the toy I just threw on the floor board for the 4th time. Why is this even an issue? She must be lazy or deaf and either way needs to be screamed at.
11. Why mom doesn’t want to hold me all the time. I am so soft and cuddly, am I not? PICK ME UP! Dammit.