Thoughts on Subsequent Mating

Check out my newest featured blog post for TheBump.com here (remember to click through the preview for the hyperlink to work).   All about the whens and ifs of having another baby.  Don’t forget to tell me where you stand!  If you already have a baby/toddler/tween are you considering another?  Do you think it’s best to have them close together or take your time? Or is one enough for you?

  • lotuslandmom - Great post – lots of food for thought! My son is 2.5 and we are due in @3 weeks – we tried to strike the balance between not too far apart/get the sleeplessness/diapers/bottles/midnight feedings over with within a five year stretch while leaving enough room between the two of them that my Toddler is a little more independent and can “help Mommy” with little things.

    That being said, were you ever really ready for your first child? I think it’s also a case of just ‘going for it’!!!!

    (Couldn’t post at other thebump.com)ReplyCancel

  • Upstatemomof3 - Well, I have a four and a half year old and an eight month old. I see both sides. I like my kids being this far apart but then again if they were closer they could play more. We are expecting another (hopefully in the fall) so ask me again next year and I will tell you if having them closer or further apart is better. But I will tell you that even though I thought I could never love anyone else as much as I love my son I certainly do love my daughter just as much. :)ReplyCancel

  • Emily - One is plenty, thankyouverymuch. Before having a kid, I wanted two, my husband wanted three, and I figured we could compromise somewhere in there. Now, I want nothing to do with any more children. Babies are way more work and way less fun than my pre-pregnancy self thought. The husband still wants more, and he seems to think I’ll come around. He couldn’t be more wrong.ReplyCancel

  • Roshelle - I am going to try to have it both ways. My first two are about 19 months apart, but we are planning on waiting five or six years before we have #3. I love having the boys close together. They are such great friends already and they are only 2 yrs and 5 months old. The reason we are waiting so long for #3 is that I am going back to school. But #3 and #4 will probably be close together like the boys.ReplyCancel

  • Andrea - I replied on the bump but when I came here to see what other people had said and I agree with Emily completely. I never thought of having more than one though. I know my limits and having two would certainly test them :-) Luckily, my husband agrees but it seems that family and friends think we are crazy for wanting just one.ReplyCancel

  • Kate - I tend to fall in the one is enough category. Now if you talked to my pre-pregnancy self I would of told you I wanted at least two kids if not three. That’s definatley not the case now. It’s probably based a bit on selfishness and it’s not cohesive with our future plans. I’ve already had people tell me that I’m wrong and will want more. I’m not ruling it out, but right now I can see myself perfectly content with one.ReplyCancel

  • Anna - It seems like everyone I know is contemplating this issue lately, myself included. As overwhelmed as I feel right now with a 7 month old, I find myself thinking that she is getting so big and I miss those newborn days! My husband and I talked about this just last week and we decided that next Spring we will try again. I guess I am of the thought that I might as well have another one while I am used to not sleeping…but I think two is my limit!ReplyCancel

  • Brandi - I have an almost 9 year old step-son at home 100% of the time and a 11 month old daughter. As for me I can not wait to have another baby. I have never been so delighted with motherhood. I enjoy every minute with my daughter and can’t wait to have another baby to expand our family. I have taken serious consideration as to the challenges of having a toddler and a newborn, but I am up for it. I figured I will just do my best to roll with the punches and remind myself to enjoy each moment. I lost my brother 5 years ago and one thing that has taught me is how important siblings are. Another baby wll be not just a gift for my husband and I, but a gift for the kids too.

    I figured to avoid getting burnt out on the diaper changes and feedings I would check 3 things off my list before we try again. Have a beer, have a cup of coffee, get a tan.

    I’ll have to get back to you after my second pregnancy to see if I am up for #3 (and if the bank approves it – darn finances!)ReplyCancel

  • Molly - We have 2 already – just under 22 months apart. Somedays are really chaotic, but even with one child your days can be chaotic. I really didn’t want to hinder my son by being an only child. This is my opinion, but I really thinks it unfair to a child to not have the sibling bond if you’re capable (obviously there are circumstances where a couple may only be able to have 1 child). I could go on and on why I think every child deserves a sibling, but I spare you the rambling. Needless to say, I’m content with the 2 I have right now, but I don’t think I’m done having children. Now we’ve already decided if #3 is more than 4 years younger than #2 we will have 4 kids total. We just have to see what the future holds for our family :)ReplyCancel

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