Okay ladies and gents (are there any gents out there reading this?), we all know the world of parenthood is ripe with judgement. You can smell it’s thick vapors permeating off of mommy and me groups, and you can feel it’s heat and intensity in the sharp, unapproving glares from people in line at the grocery store when the kid in front of them was just force fed a Snickers to make them shut the hell up. I’m not gonna lie, I’m guilty of judging parents, which I realize is the most ridiculous thing ever since I can not even begin to put myself in their shoes, but I do it nonetheless.
I find myself constantly saying to my husband, “I will NEVER…We will ALWAYS…yada yada,” but how do I know? I mean, clearly, there are some things that I can safely say we will always or never do. I’m 99.9992% positive we will always insist our child not refer to us as mother fucker and his bitch, and we will never sacrifice our baby to visiting aliens for a ride on their super cool space mobile (although that will be hard to resist). However, things like pacifiers past 6 months, and crying it out, and even spanking…yes, I have my opinions on them, but what is that opinion even based on? The rational part of me wants to open my mind and remember that all parents, children and situations are different, and that I shouldn’t judge, but then the other part of me – the your screaming kid is annoying the piss out of me part – wants to know why those parents just don’t have the good sense to get up and leave the GD movie theater with the 9 month old they should have never brought in the first place.
I really don’t want to be one of those parents that judges others and then holds themselves to such a high standard because of it. I want to be okay with not being the perfect mom, and I want to be okay with others not being perfect either. I think I’m going to perform a little experiment. I’m going to blog about all these things I judge other parents for prior to becoming a parent myself. I want you to chime in if you have an opinion or a point of view you think I should consider. Then, once I finally do have a little ankle-bitter, I’m going to come back and re-evaluate these judgements. I think it will be interesting to see if and how much my views will change. Also, if you already are a parent, I want to know how your point of views changed.
Judgement #1 – I hate wheely heel shoes. I can never imagine being okay with my my child essentially rollerskating around the grocery store, mall, and other places where adults are trying to get shit done without having to dodge out of control children.
(I was inspired to think about my “judgements” after reading I Was a Really Good Mom Before I Had Kids.)